The Brooklyn Nester

Limited Counter Space, Revisted; Pt.2 : A Solid Purchase

2009-02-09T12:45:00.000-05:00

Waaaay back in the fall, I found myself back at The Brooklyn Kitchen to browse.

With little in the way of cash, it seemed unlikely that I'd make a purchase.
But, there it sat on the bookshelf. Beard on Bread. And, after much consideration, and finally, an approving nod from addROC, who was still sifting through the cocktail toys, I decided that, even when extremely poor, a good book is always a good idea.

And, the ladies at The Brooklyn Kitchen seemed to agree, stating "A solid purchase," as I paid at the checkout line.

So, I splurged. I got the book by the infamous James Beard, which contains his 100 favorite bread recipes, both hearty and sweet.

So, I took my maiden voyage into the abyss of Beard Loafdom and made his recipe for Lemon Bread.

Here's the loaf, pre-bake:

And, post-bake:

Now, this bread did not turn out quite as lovely as I'd hoped. It was a little dry, perhaps because I over-baked it a bit. And, the lemon flavor was off. addROC and I decided that this was probably due to some pith getting mixed in with my lemon zest.

So, I must try this again...maybe soon. The oven in our new apt. is almost exactly to temperature! Huzzah!

Limited Counter Space, Revisited; Pt.1: The Best News EVER!

2009-02-05T10:00:00.002-05:00

So, I think the most noteworthy thing to happen in recent times, also happens to be the BEST thing to happen in recent times.

Um, OBAMA!

Believe it or not, these cookies actually weren't made on election day. These pics are so fucking old, they are actually from the evening of the last debate! But, they looked so fabulous that, I said to myself, how could I NOT show you people?

So, I give you what I have labeled: The Great Debate Cookie.

Here, I paint excitedly:

This was before any of us were SURE that all our Obama dreams would come true, so, please excuse the red cookies. But, before anyone had won the good fight, I felt compelled to make sure that all parties were fairly represented.

Hooray for Obama! And hooray for the ever-versatile frosted butter cookie! And hooray, of course, to The Brooklyn Kitchen, for the awesome U.S.A. cookie cutter!

Um, yeah. This blog sucks.

2009-02-04T12:00:00.000-05:00

So, I took a hella-long hiatus and didn't tell anyone.

Sorry ma peeps.

I tend to suck on occasion. And the past, um, five months, are just another shining example of my fickle mentality.

So, if you are/were one of the three people who frequented The Brooklyn Nester with any kind of regularity, I'll apologize an umpteenth time for my incompetence.

Looking forward: I'm going to try, try being the operative word, to actually stop into The Brooklyn Nester and let y'all know what's going on in our kitchen. I've been cookin' it up here in our NEW Greenpoint apartment! Holla!

To catch you up on all the fun times I've been having, the next few posts will be from the kitchen in our old apartment...a farewell if you will, in a 3-part series called: Limited Counter Space, Revisited.

So, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and all that garbage.

Join us for future postings. Or don't.

But, either way, I'm back baby.

The Need for No-Knead

2008-08-29T09:00:00.002-04:00

Here's just a little nibble'n'nosh that I made recently.

I've made two loaves of Cook's Illustrated's No-Knead Bread 2.0 Recipe.

It's easy to make, albeit time consuming, and it tastes great.

Mmmm...fresh baked bread.

I made a loaf a few nights ago and addROC and I bought a ton of cheese. We practically killed the whole loaf for dinner alone.

It was classy, in that filthy, cheesy way.

Oh-so-easy and delicious.

And, did I mention: CHEAP as hell!

Oh, Those Scrumptious Southerners

2008-08-28T08:00:00.000-04:00

To me, great biscuits are the epitome of southern cooking.

Simple, high calorie eats that you can mix and match to almost any meal.
They're good at breakfast stacked high with eggs, cheese, and bacon.
They're good at dinner lathered up in gravy, beans, slaw, and juicy pulled pork.

Heck, they're just freakin' good.

So, when I tried Paula Deen's Cream Biscuit recipe from "Paula's Home Cooking," I nearly croaked.

These biscuits are easy, delicious, and perfect. And, while you'll probably want to ignore the calorie count, after one bite, I'm guessing you won't give a damn.

These biscuits are da bomb!

Paula Deen's Cream Biscuits

2 cups self-rising flour, plus more for dusting
1 tablespoon sugar
1 1/2 cups heavy whipping cream

Preheat oven to 500 degrees F.

In a medium bowl, stir together the flour, sugar, and cream until the dough forms a ball. Turn the dough out onto a surface dusted with additional flour. Fold the dough in 1/2 and knead 5 to 7 times, adding just enough flour to keep dough from sticking to your hands. Gently roll out dough to 1/2-inch thickness. Using a 3-inch biscuit cutter coated with flour, cut dough into biscuits. Place on baking sheet coated with cooking spray, leaving at least 1-inch between each biscuit. Bake for 10 minutes, or until golden brown.

Mother Knows Best: Peppermint Ice Cream Torte

2008-08-26T20:14:00.010-04:00

Greetings from the dead.

Yes, yes. I know I am the shittiest blogger ever, and all that. The best I can say is a new job at a new restaurant has kept me very busy, and, when I'm not busy workin'...I'm busy taking a load off.

But, though I have been tardy with the blog, fear not. I have still been cooking, however, on a somewhat infrequent basis.

And, in my most recent adventures...I took addROC on a trip down memory lane.

As you may or may not remember, addROC's mom gave me a recipe book for Christmas that includes her recipes with some significance in addROC's youth.

Previously, I made Boston Cream Pie for addROC's birthday from the family inspired, recipe collection.

This time? Peppermint Ice Cream Torte.

One of addROC's favorite treats of yesteryear.

I started by layering a Homemade Granola Mix, then, a layer of Peppermint Chocolate Chunk Ice Cream (Ben & Jerry's of course), and then a middle layer of Chocolate Creme which I prepare below:

Then, I spread the Chocolate Creme over a frozen Ice Cream layer before two more rounds of freezer time!

Then, after much layering and much freezing, it was finally time for EATING!

Refreshing and delicious.

addROC seemed to enjoy it.

Though, deep down, I know it'll never be Mom's.

And, he did take the liberty to bitch about the fact that I used WHITE Peppermint Ice Cream, as opposed to GREEN.

His Mom's response?

"Who sez real men don't eat green food?!"

Thanks for the recipe Cindy! It was damn good!

Sugarbush Farm: Where (Cheesy) Dreams Come True

2008-07-08T14:00:00.004-04:00

addROC and I found ourselves on an extended Vermont vacation for a friend's wedding. So, after checking out a map of Woodstock, VT, I declared that a trip to Sugarbush Farm, where the cheese is plentiful and the maple syrup flows like wine, was an absolute necessity.

So, we walk into the Sugarbush Farm Country Store first, and, there are no other words to express the feeling other than, "Holy Shit!"

Sugarbush was frikkin' stocked with homemade jams, mustards, maple candies, and VT oddities.

Which we proceeded to sample...

Then, it was on to the incredible cheese room, where we got to try every cheese they make at Sugarbush!!!

Next, we watch in awe as the Ladies de Sugarbush prepare and package cheese by first wrapping it in thin foil and then triple-dipping it in wax! This was so exciting. I felt like, finally, I was able to witness something worthy of a Mister Rodgers field trip:

The ladies.

Foiled cheese.

Smoked cheese, before foiling.

Onion cheese, after being triple-waxed.

Next, addROC and I put on our best Moose faces and smile!

Then, we see, what's that?! A sign for a Maple Walk?! Let's go!

addROC and our friend Aaron head up to the teeny-tiny little bridge that begins the maple walk, as I bring it up the rear.

After the Maple walk, which was peaceful and oh-so-Vermontish, Aaron and I enjoy a refreshing bottle of Sugarbush Farm's own Root Beer! Sooooo fuckin' good!

Finally, we bid ol' Sugarbush Farm goodbye, after buying $50 worth of cheese and Maple Mustard!!! What a day trip!

Go to Sugarbushfarm.com RIGHT NOW and buy cheese. We've already ordered a ton for friends and family, and it ships extremely well.

Viva La Sugarbush!

The Good Ship, Lollipop.

2008-06-05T11:00:00.009-04:00

I've never liked Lollipops all that much.
Even less so, are small, high-pitched children who sing about them.

But, I recently tried a new recipe that is changing my tune.

Cheesecake Lollipops.

These charming, little treats were easy enough to make, tasty, and a very pretty addition to our Mother's Day dinner party spread, indeed.

Start off by baking some cheesecake! Awww yeah!

Then, prepare to get messy. 'Cause you're gonna rip that cheesecake apart after its cooled and form nice, little balls.

Then, impale the the balls like you're fighting in Braveheart and freeze the little guys solid. Once they're good to go, dip them in your favorite chocolate flavor combinations!

What chocolaty flavors did I pick, you ask?:

Milk Chocolate and Peanut
Milk Chocolate and Andes Mints
White Chocolate
White Chocolate and Dark Chocolate

Yup, it sure is a sweet trip to the candy shop!

The Easiest Way To Be The Best-Girlfriend-Ever

2008-06-04T11:00:00.010-04:00

Go ahead.

Break out the unitard, frillies, and lace.

It's all well and good.

But, I'll let you in on a little secret. When your Mom said that the way to a man's heart was via his stomach, she wasn't too far off.

My super-hero specialties are my little secret, but, when my boo, addROC, was coming home after a long and snack-less day, I knew where my ass belonged.

The kitchen.

Ladies, throw on your sexiest teddy and heels.
We're making snacks.

Quick and Easy Crostini and Red Pepper Dip

First, I baked a fresh loaf of my famous, and nearly perfected French Bread. But, if you're not into baking, or pressed for time, just pick up a French loaf at your local supermarket.

Next, I cut up that bad boy into thin, round slices.

Heat up your oven to 450 degrees, paint the tops with olive oil and toast these guys until they are golden brown. It should only take around 10 minutes. But, keep a constant watch to prevent burning.

Now, onto the Red Pepper dip!

First, assemble your ingredients:

Yup, that's it:
1 Cup Roasted Red Peppers
4 oz Cream Cheese
8-10 Fresh Basil Leaves
2 Cloves Garlic (Medium to small size)

Now, just throw that stuff into a food processor or fancy-schmancy blender and whip it up!

Voila! Crostini and Red Pepper dip!

Now all you have to do is, lay out the goods...and wait for your lover to take the bait.

Then, take the time to revel in your Best-Girlfriend-Ever glory!

'Mole! 'Mole!

2008-06-03T18:30:00.000-04:00

No, not that kind of mole.

Actually, I'm talkin' about the Guac-a-mole!
And, lord, do I LOVE guacamole.
Nothing says summer like some ooey-gooey, green-guac-goodness.

So, I trotted out to purchase supplies:

No Mexican Summer party should be without the usual suspects:
Tomato, onion, avocado, cilantro, jalapeño, lemons, limes, chips, salsa, red beans, garlic, and most importantly, Tequila.

So, I chopped up the goods, like so:

And, stir!

So amazing. Especially after many Margaritas and even more shots of Tequila!

'Mole! 'Mole!

Eat, drink, and celebrate the arrival of this Bitch's favorite time of year! Summer!

Gifts From The Matriarch

2008-05-22T10:00:00.000-04:00

My Mom rocks.

Her finger is always on the pulse of our kitchen because I blab, blab, blab to her all the live-long day about addROC's many adventures in the great culinary abyss.

I'm lucky, because, she's not one of those boyfriend-hater Moms.

In fact, knowing I'm with addROC gives her comfort. Not only because she knows I'm loved and taken care of, but, most importantly, because she knows I'm well fed!

So, when it's time to give gifts to addROC, she's always thinkin' about food.

So, for his b-day this year, she got him a set of Le Creuset Crock Bowls.

Um, Sweeeeeeet!!!

So, addROC took his gifts, and did what he does best, cook up some food!

Tonight's special?

French Onion Soup!

Holla! (And, thanks Ma!)

Ramp Me, Baby.

2008-05-02T10:00:00.002-04:00

RAMPS RAMPS RAMPS.

All the live-long day.

Everyone who's anyone in the food community, and beyond, is talking about these wild leeks. Foodie friends, all the blogs, snooty and otherwise, it's insane. I had to know, what is soooo great about these little fuckers?

Why did I have to go to the Greenmarket in Union Square BEFORE work, just to make sure what seemed like Greenmarket contraband hadn't sold out? And, furthermore, WHY did I pay $6 for just two bushells? Eh? Eh?

Well, after much skepticism, I found out what the big frikkin' deal was with ramps.

They are delicious.

If I have to get up early to get the little buggers again, so help me God, I will.
It was a meal to remember, partly due to the mystery that was somehow solved, and partly due to addROC's superb execution. Which, will unfold below:

addROC Sautés Ramps and Prosciutto .

Then, adds pasta and a healthy amount of delicious Romano Cheese.

Plate and savor.

RAMPS. RAMPS. RAMPS.

I annoy addROC with my obnoxious ramp songs.

But, take my word for it, they're worth singing about.

Get up early, and shake your putootie over to the Greenmarket for New York's Culinary Contraband!!!

RAMPS!!!

2 Cakes To Rule Them All

2008-04-25T10:30:00.004-04:00

addROC and I are now both officially ONE birthday away from landmark ages.

I turned 24 in early April, and addROC, or as I like to call him, Gramps, turned 29 just last night.

While I will, on occasion, search for crow's feet, I'm still far, far more concerned with birthday snacks.

There's nothing like celebrating with a big ol' birthday cake.
So this year, with both addROC and I clinging to our dear youths, as the ever-approaching, fat ol' round numbers edge closer, we decided that there is no time like the present to, as Marie Antoinette so fervently declared, "Let Them Eat Cake!!!"

addROC is the best. So, when I came home from work on my birthday I had this bad boy waiting for me!!! And, yes, it was a Funfetti Cake. It was awesome and mammoth. We ate it for days and days. It was glorious.

For addROC's birthday, I knew I had to make his favorite: Boston Creme Pie.

It was my maiden voyage with this cake, addROC's Mom provided me with the recipe that she used to make him every year, for every birthday.

I was intimidated. In the past, I have purchased said Boston Creme Pies at fine baking establishments. But, I did it, and it was reeeal good. Maybe not as good as his Mom's, but, I still get an A for effort. Right Gramps?

The Boston Creme Pie:

1. Make Cake.

2. Make Custard.

3. Combine Cake and Custard.

4. Drown Cake and Custard with Chocolate Glaze.

5. Feed the Birthday Boy!!! Happy Birthday addROC!!!

Frikkin' Yummy.

One Funfetti Cake. One Boston Creme Pie.
Two Cakes to Rule Them All.

Happy Birthday!!!

Mary, Mary Quite Contrary: Seed Starting

2008-04-21T10:30:00.003-04:00

(Painting By: Maxfield Parrish)

Spring has sprung, Nesters, and there is no time like the present.

Even if you are living in the tiniest apartment in Brooklyn, there is no excuse not to do a bit of gardening. Even if you've got just one viable window.

Fortunately for us, addROC and I have a great little roof space. And, while it maybe not be the Ritz, this year, I've decided I am going to go crazy and attempt a ridiculous roof garden.

Here are the the first group of seeds that I've started:

1. The Scarlet O'Hara Morning Glory.
2. Wildflower Perennial Mix.
3. Wildflower Bluebonnet Mix.
4. Sweet Peas (the flower).

I am supremely stoked.

Even more so, because these pictures are from almost a week ago! There have been some serious developments to my tray of peat starters! I will update you very soon so you can see the sprouts and the new flowers and veggies we've started, right here in our own little Brooklyn kitchen.

Seeds are cheap. So, head to K-Mart and load up on flowers, edibles, and all the garden amenities that will make starting your Spring garden easy!

The Freaking "To-Go" Box

2008-04-15T10:00:00.002-04:00

For Thanksgiving this year, my mother asked me to bring dessert.
And, of course, I brought, like, 3 pies.
So, because I knew addROC and I would be traveling from our neck-of-the-woods to my folks place out in Bay Ridge, I went to the The Broadway Panhandler and invested in a set of Assemble-It-Yourself cardboard pastry boxes.

Obviously, Thanksgiving has come and gone. And, let me tell you something: No matter what I do, no matter how hard I try, I cannot get rid the these freakin' pastry boxes.

So, in a valiant effort to get the f#*kin' boxes out of my life, and into someone else's kitchen to take up inordinate amounts of truly invaluable space: I brought a cake to Reid's.

My Caramel Cake, inspired by the genius that is Smitten Kitchen, was a light, white, fluffy, delicious cake before it was corrupted by filthy, sticky, sweet and creamy caramel.

1. 100% Naked...and we think she's been working out. Lookin' reeeal good, Cake.

2. Caramel. Hot, hot Caramel.

3. Cake, Caramel, and a "To-Go" box. Classy and functional!

SUPER HELPFUL TIP:
Do yourself a frikkin' favor.
Buy your "To-Go" Boxes on a need-to-need basis.
Heed my advice or be stuck with a shit load of boxes that have no apparent purpose other than to remind you of the food you're not making, and to deplete precious, precious cupboard space!

Do You Know the Muffin Man?

2008-04-09T10:30:00.002-04:00

The Muffin Man?

The Muffin Man.
Do You Know The Muffin Man,
Who Lives on Drury Lane?

Yes, actually, I do.
He invaded my apartment, raided my cabinets, and demanded that I make muffins. Lots of muffins.

It all started at the MET Supermarket in Greenpoint. Strawberries are on sale for $1.99. To me, this can only mean one thing, Spring! So, I snatched up my berries and high-tailed it to the check-out.

Upon returning to my apartment, there he sat, the little imp.
Yes, The Muffin Man.

And, I knew what to do.

1. Wash my Spring Cheap-O berries!

2. Dice berries and the use a Microplane to get the zest of one lemon.

3. Mix fruit into my versatile muffin batter-base, portion, and bake.

4. Devour.

5. Thank The Muffin Man for making a long trip from Drury Lane, creepy as he may be.

The Bitch's Strawberry-Lemon Muffins

INGREDIENTS
2 cups all-purpose flour
3 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup white sugar
1 egg
1 cup milk
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1 cup diced Strawberries
Zest of One Lemon

DIRECTIONS
1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
2. Mix the flour, baking powder, salt and sugar in a large bowl. Make a well in the center of the dry ingredients.
3. In a small bowl, beat egg. Stir in milk, oil, and lemon zest.
4. Pour wet ingredients into the well of the flour mixture. Mix quickly and lightly with a fork until moistened, but do not beat.
5. Fold in strawberries gently, until just incorporated.
6. Portion batter evenly into 12 muffin cups or a muffin tin.
7. Bake for 25 minutes, or until golden.

The New Man in My Life

2008-04-07T10:30:00.000-04:00

First things first.
My apologies for being a terrible/horrible/horrendous blogger.
I have been busy as hell, and when I do find a free moment, I'm a total slacker.
So, for those of you who have checked this blog faithfully, I want to say thanks, and, sorry. I hope to be a little bit better about posting.

In other news, I want to talk about my new man.
Mr. Clean.

Sure, you've used his liquid cleaners. But, ask yourself:
Have I tried the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser yet?

If your answer was "No," you need to get real. Because you are working too hard to clean your shit.

My bathroom was in really bad shape.
And when I say really bad shape, I mean, there was shit growing in there that I was afraid would spore out and make new colonies in my hair, skin, and mouth.

Bathing loses that refreshing feeling when you step out of the shower feeling dirtier than when you stepped in.
So, when we invited friends, and their baby, over for dinner, it was time to get down to the nitty-gritty. After all, I didn't want to be responsible for infecting our friend's child with a wild-mold-spore disease.

I got the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser and did practically nothing except wave it over the nasty film of my tub, sink, and shower walls. And, as if Jesus were there waving his hands over my bathroom, blessing its near-damned soul, it was clean.

Go buy the Magic Eraser.
Like the holy gift of the ATM, you will wonder how you functioned in society before this product existed.

St. Paddy's Day Celebrations

2008-03-18T10:30:00.001-04:00

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Hi-Ho Nesters!!!
I know it's been awhile, but, I'm back with a special, beef lover's, St. Patrick's Day Special!!!

Fun times started over the weekend.

My Irish blood was boiling, so we decided to make it a culinary celebration!

Saturday it was a traditional boiled Irish supper.

We got to boiling some Chuck Steak in the slow cooker with: Guinness, Peppercorns, and a few Bay Leaves...

Later we added Potatoes, Cabbage, and Carrots. Mmmm....

But, the best was saved for the actual night of St. Patrick's Day.
addROC made a ridiculous Guinness marinated steak.
Which was cooked to perfection.

Then, we moved on to a traditional Irish treat that is so delectable and delightful, that its consumption with a beverage like Guinness or Jameson is ABSOLUTELY necessary, and really, just plain common sense.

The One...The Only....

IRISH SODA BREAD!!!!

We ate, drank, and were oh-so-very-merry.
Just as St. Paddy would have wanted it himself.

Cheers to the Irish!
Erin Go Bragh!!!

Cast Iron Skillet Cornbread

2008-03-06T10:30:00.002-05:00

My mother gave both addROC and I gift certificates to the hot new kitchen store in SoHo, Sur La Table.

Naturally, addROC and I went apeshit.

After going to the store twice, contemplating this and that, checking out the SILPATS and bar spoons...we got a few very choice items.

addROC's favorite: The Cast Iron Skillet.

While, at first, this little toy just reminded me of cowboy eggs and French people, I've found that I've become quite fond of this heavy-ass pan.

So, when addROC made chili, we had to make cornbread. Off I went, mixing up the dry ingredients, like so:

Then, the wet ingredients:

And then, POP, into the oven, pan and all!

So fun, right? A pan, that goes in the oven and doesn't melt?!
And, it produced this gem-of-a-hunk-of cornbread:

Holla!

Now, all's I need is to make cowboy eggs and to find some French people to enjoy them with me!

But, for now, cornbread will have to do.

Tart Smarts

2008-02-27T09:30:00.001-05:00

It's plainly obvious that I adore Christopher Kimball and everything and anything that has to do with America's Test Kitchen.

So, when I found myself in the dessert-y mood, I went straight to the Best of America's Test Kitchen 2008.

And there they were...calling my name. Rustic Free-Form Apple Tartlets.

So, I hopped-to and whipped up a new kind of pastry dough (one that requires no shortening, but uses cream cheese). Let it chill and rolled out my tiny tarts.

The apple filling was simple, leaving the fruit to speak for itself, which is always more satisfying then adding ooodles and ooodles of sugar and other crap.

It really couldn't have been easier.

Just make the dough, wrap it around some fruit, bake, and you're done.

The result?

The closest thing to buying awesomely awesome tarts from a swanky bakery.

These were phenomenal. And so frikkin' easy.

So, I was able to escape my pie obsession for a few days, only to become obsessed with Rustic Free-Form Tartlets. I am definitely going to make these again and experiment with other fruits.

OMG like Strawberry....

Chris Kimball...yet again you have proven that you are a God among us mere mortals.

Let Them Eat Cake(s): Valentine's Aftermath

2008-02-15T09:45:00.005-05:00

Last night I decided to continue my tradition of making cupcakes for Valentine's Day.

I was stoked on the L train just thinking about the little suckers.
I'm not really much of a cake person, but, there is something just wonderful about little, self-contained cakes.
A single serving, a dainty treat, so darling.
Such a cute little snack was meant to be baked on the most lovey-dovey day of the year.

But, after much anticipation, I realized I forgot the frosting when I finally got to the apartment. I had too many things to get together, so, out of frustration, I almost scratched the idea all together.

Then, I saw the food coloring in the cupboard.

If they can't be frosted, then damn it, they will be pink. So, off I went.

First: Pink batter.

Next: Into the oven, just like Hansel and Gretel. Only, if these cakes had been those children, they totally would have died.

Finishing Touches: Making these cupcakes as cheesy as possible for addROC, because, what would Valentine's Day be without a sickeningly sweet message to send him into the throes of passion?

Yes. I made a heart out of baby-cakes that reads: "I <3 U BABY CAKES."

Does that make me a loser?
Probably.

But, in the end, loser or not, I made some cute-ass cupcakes. Delectable for zee munchin'!

Enjoy your weekend Nesters!
Happy President's Day!

And, Happy 100th Post to us here at The Brooklyn Nester!!!

Happy Valentine's Day!

2008-02-14T10:00:00.001-05:00

I'm sending some love out to you all, faithful Nesters!

Make something tasty for the one(s) you love!

And, if you don't have the time, or the patience, to make cupcakes...then promise me you'll eat an inordinate amount of chocolate.

See you soon! I'm off to spread the love!

Let's Get Crafty: DIY Crochet Hearts

2008-02-13T10:00:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow is the most loved and loathed holiday of the year: Valentine's Day.

Whether you're a lover or a hater...it's coming.
So, why not have a little fun?
Even if you're single...impress your crush with the latest in my adventures in craftdom: Crochet hearts!
And, if you're not single, annoy your loved ones by having tiny crochet hearts ALL OVER your apartment.

While searching zee internets for random Valentine's Day crafts I came across this video:

And, not a second later, I was off to B.E. Yarn (784 Manhattan Ave near Calyer St.) in Greenpoint.

I got me some purdy new yarn, and hunkered down on the couch.
It was actually pretty easy. So, now, I'm all about the crochet tutorials. And, I have a shitload of pink, crocheted hearts laying all over my living room.

Seriously though, how precious are these?!

Even though they serve no purpose whatsoever, save for putting me in the Valentine's spirit, they're mad cute.

I'm think I'm going to use them as little doilies for chocolate.
Is that weird?

So, go forth, crochet hearts.
They're festive in that lovey-dovey way and oh-so-granny-ish.

And if you're going to be all:
"I hate Valentine's day. Psshah."

Then, get black yarn...and shut up.

Irish Lace Cookies: The Not-So-Pretty Irish Lasses

2008-02-11T11:00:00.001-05:00

Ah, the Irish...how I love them.

In fact, I'm obsessed.
As it turns out, I love Irish people, literature, culture, music, and beverages so much, I actually majored in Irish Studies when I attended college.

One of the overriding themes in Irish history is that the people of Ireland, when pressed, can make a little go a long way. Back in the day, peasants on the Emerald Isle didn't get to indulge in many pleasures, especially culinary delights.

The people made the most out of what they had sitting in their near bare cupboards. So, out of strife and innovation, the Irish Lace Cookie was born.

It's a cookie with practically nothing in it, yet, it tastes like a little bite of heaven.

So, I hearkened back to the days when my ancestors were still starving somewhere in County Clare, and baked a batch:

And hot-damn, were they the ugliest little cookies I ever did see.

Ugly, but delicious.

All I need now is a shot of Jameson...and it's a winter warm-up snack that can't be beat!

I'm so Crap-tastic.

2008-02-07T11:30:00.000-05:00

Sorry y'all.

Work and family related hullabaloo has kept this Nester a little too busy as of late.

Sincere apologies on the lack of posting. But, I promise, in the next few days we should be back up and running.

I am dying to do some baking...so, I hope that you'll come and check out my soon-to-be-posted snacks!

I hope that you all had a wonderful National Pie Day.

I'd like to personally thank all the bloggers who submitted their pie photos! Delicious and Wonderful!

Have a great day! See you soon!

Happy National Pie Day!!!

2008-01-23T10:30:00.000-05:00

YES! It has finally arrived! The highly anticipated National Pie Day! And, this lady couldn't be more pleased.

I have two kinds of VERY SPECIAL PIE to share with you today.

As you can see above, last night we were celebrating the eve of this great day by eating some Chicken, Ham, and Fennel Pot Pies.

Freaking ridiculous. So good effin' good that it made me remember why I got so gung-ho about today in the first place.

Above, is the beautiful four-some that emerged from our oven.

Here's a before shot of our gastronomic gems with a little egg-wash:

And what kind of blog would we be if we didn't show you how soft and flaky our crust was?

So that was amazing. But, did you think that was all I was gonna pull out for National Pie Day?

Hells no. I wouldn't jip you like that. Check out the fantastic dessert from start to finish!

Strawberry Butterfly Pie

First, the gorgeous berries are washed:

Next, I rolled out an All-American double crust (notice I drink beer while I work, an absolute necessity):

Then I mixed our strawberries with tapioca, sugar, and cut some butter all around, because, what would pie be without LOTS of butter?:

Finally, it was time to assemble the pie, after cutting a lovely butterfly steam vent, of course:

Into the oven she went, and out she came, looking buxom and bubbly:

And, at last, slices were cut and many-a-tummy was made happy:

Amen! So good it's Godly!

Pie is a passion. And today we can go ALL-OUT!

Make pie, bake pie, and eat pie!

HAPPY NATIONAL PIE DAY!!!

Check out pictures sent to me from fellow bloggers and readers!!!

This beauty was sent to me by Mrs. Hess, one of my most favorite food bloggers! Isn't her Chicken Pot Pie fabulous?! Go check out her blog, Last Night's Dinner, this second! Her culinary adventures will get your mouth watering!

And, look at this bad boy!!! Nabeela, hostess of the wonderful blog Trial and Error, sent me a picture of her luscious Wild Blueberry Crumble Pie, ummm, SCRUMPTIOUS!

And here's a submission from Harry, of The Brooklyn Kitchen. He made a Pumpkin Pie with a Graham Cracker Crust....YUMMY!

Jamaican Beef Pies*

2008-01-22T10:45:00.000-05:00

After giving dinner a a great deal of thought, trying to keep in step with this week's pie theme, we decided to bend the rules a bit.

We decided to make some meat pies...

So, we pulled out the beer and the Jamaican Rum (Holla!) and got to cookin' some grub as if we were on the beaches of Negril, as opposed to our cold-ass kitchen.

Above, I rolled out the pastry, which is very similar to the pastry of your traditional pie. Though, it does contain quite a bit more flour.

Then, using an ugly, little bowl, I cut out circles of pastry...which would soon be stuffed with tasty, tasty beef.

addROC stuffed those bad boys, and then sealed them shut with egg and rum...and into the lovin' heat of the oven they went. And, then, after some minor dripping, we removed our tasty Jamaican Meat Pies* from the oven...

Then, we placed a lovely veggie and ranch appetizer on the table for pre-dinner nibbles.

And, for the final plating, addROC mixed up some of his famous bean salad, grabbed our meat pies* and we went to town...

SOOOOOOO delicious. The spices in the meat filling were fragrant and tasty.
It was a new kind of pie, and it got me thinkin' that I should branch out more often.

In conclusion to today's post, I would like to remind you all that:

TOMORROW is National Pie Day.
We will have some special pies to post from our kitchen, and we hope to see your contributions as well!

Send us a photo of the pie you've made (it can be sweet OR savory) with a brief description and we will include it in tomorrow's post.

All entries should be sent to: thebrooklynnester (at) gmail (dot) com

Have a great time baking (and eating) your pie! I look forward to seeing your entries!

*These "pies" are typically called "Jamaican Beef Patties." But, for the sake of pie week, I am taking the liberty of calling them pies. If you have objections to this slight substitution, I apologize, but, in actuality, they are little pies! Extremely delicious little pies!

Keep Your Eyes on the Pies

2008-01-18T11:30:00.000-05:00

Yes Nesters, it is a Holiday weekend, in many respects.

This weekend, we celebrate a man whose vision and goodness still resonates throughout this country and the world. On Martin Luther King Day, we all take a moment to remember and to honor a national emblem of peace, whose loss is still felt. And, whose message is carried on by the many hearts he touched.

MLK, The Brooklyn Nester salutes you, for pursuing peace in a world that has far too little.

In addition to remembering Dr. King, addROC and I will be busy preparing for this coming Wednesday, January 23rd. AKA National Pie Day.

(Painting: © Wayne Thiebaud)

I encourage everyone to make a pie! Make many pies!

Email your photos and a short description to [thebrooklynnester (at) gmail (dot) com] and we will post your photos on the 23rd!

For pie-spiration, take a look at all the pies The Brooklyn Nester has made in 2007!!!

Pear Pie. Crisp and lovely!

Cherry Pie. Horrendous!

Apple Pie. Delicious, and oh-so-American!

Raspberry Chiffon Pie. Amazing...my favorite of the entire year!

Peanut Butter Cream Pie w/Chocolate-Coated Rice Crispie^© Crust. addROC liked this one, but, it was a little too much Peanut Butter for me!

Gingered-Lemon Meringue Pie. A sour, bitter disaster.

White Chocolate Pecan Pie. My first pie EVER! And it was good! What can I say? Pie and I are a match made in pastry heaven!!!

So, enjoy your MLK day, and think about making some Pies for Peace.

MLK...this pie's for you!

Bavarian Night (Sort Of)

2008-01-16T10:30:00.000-05:00

Willkommen Nesters!

Welcome, indeed, to our Bavarian Night, or so I insisted on calling it. Though, in actuality it was really nothing other than addROC and I happily scurrying across our kitchen preparing to bake (Bavarian) pretzels. Wondering, the whole time, how long it would be before they were baking in the oven and addROC would be standing at the stove grilling (Bavarian) Bratwurst and boiling (Bavarian) Pasta.

So, the (Bavarian) Pretzel making began with the rolling of the dough that I had allowed to rise for an hour.

Next, addROC and I twisted them into teeny-weeny, cutesy-wootsy baby (Bavarian) pretzels!

Then, I brushed them with a lovely egg wash, and we both sprinkled some course salt, both plain Sea Salt and natural Celtic Grey Sea Salt, over the tops:

So, right before they went in to the oven, they looked something like this:

Into the oven they went! Gott sei Dank!* And then out they came, and they were as golden and adorable as I could ever have wished for!

And finally, after much labor, we sat down to enjoy our (Bavarian) Bratwurst, Pasta, and Pretzel Feast.

Köstlich!**

*Thank God!
**Delicious!

Nester of the Week: Rose Levy Beranbaum

2008-01-15T11:00:00.000-05:00

After officially announcing pie season, here at The Brooklyn Nester, it would be inappropriate to ignore a very special lady who has influenced the world of pie and pastry exponentially. Rose Levy Beranbaum is the author of the famed and, not to mention, completely necessary: The Pie and Pastry Bible.

If you don't have her book(s), I bet you've made one of her recipes. Epicurious.com draws many of their pie and pastry recipes from her books...and, she hosts a wonderful blog, Real Baking With Rose, equipped with recipes and a ton of baking tips and tidbits.

So, this pie season, we celebrate you Rose. Here's to you, for making our quest for the perfect pie just a little bit easier...crust and all.

Prepare Ye, The Way Of The Pie

2008-01-11T10:30:00.000-05:00

Hear ye! Hear ye!

It's time to get ready for a holiday that is so great, so spectacular, that it has to wait for Christmas, New Years, and Martin Luther King Day to pass...

Yes...January 23rd is National Pie Day.

And here, at The Brooklyn Nester, we take pie VERY, VERY seriously.

So, in preparation for this great day...it has officially become pie season.

I hope to post several pies in the coming weeks, and, hope to have a VERY special pie on the actual day itself, which happens to fall on a Wednesday.

I encourage you, faithful nester, to make pies as well.

Apple, Mincemeat, Pecan, Sour Cherry, Blueberry, Strawberry Rhubarb, Chocolate Peanut Butter, Chicken Pot, and the list goes on....

Make a pie, any pie, send us [thebrooklynnester (at) gmail (dot) com] a photo with a short description and WE WILL POST IT on the 23rd of January, NATIONAL PIE DAY!!!!

Pies now, and forever! Prepare ye, the way of the pie!

I Can Mash Potato...I Can Do the (Cheddar) Twist(s)!!!

2008-01-10T10:00:00.000-05:00

Finally, after days of wanting to post, but, not finding the time or motivation. I travelled to the homestead...determined.

This holiday season has been pretty jam packed. And, as much as I love the razzle dazzle and the sound of wrapping paper being torn, I'm worn out.

So, in the aftermath, I've found myself hunkering as close to the couch as possible, and have let myself become inundated with the crap that flows through, and pumps out of my TV set.

But, other other night, I said "No more!" I went to the store and purchased means to bake...yeasted breads!

I went forth, and made scrumptious Cheddar Twists.

First I made the dough and portioned it out. You can see (above) that I used a tape measure to make sure all my twists were 14" long. Wowwee!

After rolling them out, I halved them, and twisted them.

Then, I let them rise, painted them with egg wash, and sprinkled them with Parmesan cheese.

And then, I reveled in their beauty after witnessing their crusty goodness.

Mmmm...cheesy.

I highly recommend that you check out BreadWorld.com, the site for Fleischmann's Yeast. They have a ton of great recipes. And, I trust them. Sometimes you find recipes on the net that just aren't quite right, especially when it comes to yeasty breads. So far, BreadWorld.com has been excellent for me!

Go, Bake away!

Happy New Year!!!

2008-01-03T10:45:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year to you all, my faithful Nesters!

May you have a happy and healthy New Year!

This year, here at The Brooklyn Nester, we hope to domesticate you even further by baking our way to bliss!!!

I had a great Christmas vacation and am feeling inspired now that I've returned home to my little slice of life in Ye Olde Brooklyn.

It's cold as fuck today, so, I'm sitting here in my cubicle thinking of nothing but steaming hot pies being pulled from my cozy little oven.

This Christmas, I believe, Santa went a little ape shit. addROC and I got soooo much kitchen stuff from our families that our cabinets cannot even contain most of it. Our counter and kitchen table are littered with gadgets, gizmos, pans, and knives.

And we're ready...to Nest bitches!

Join us, won't you, in our quest for domestic bliss in this urban jungle.

I can't wait to get cookin' AND postin'.

Best wishes to you all! The Bitch is back! And it's time to EAT!

Merry Christmas!!!

2007-12-23T16:00:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all!

I hope that you Nest, with zest, straight into 2008!

See you in the new year! This Bitch is off to celebrate in style with addROC and the rest of my wonderful family!

Take care Nesters!

'Til then....

Ho Ho Ho!!!! Merry Christmas Bitches!!!

A Very Merry Mock-Christmas

2007-12-19T10:30:00.000-05:00

With the tree decorated and friends abound there was one thing left to do...

EAT!!!

Yes, another mock-holiday filled Reid, Cliff, addROC and I with much joy.

So, we ate and drank a-plenty, because, well, it's what Jesus would have wanted us to do if he were still chillin' in his little manger.

So, first, addROC mixed up some fancy and tasty drinks, called,
Back Forty:

Then, after we were properly hydrated, it was on to the cheeses:

Then, king of all things pork, Reid, did his thing making some super tasty Bacon Wrapped Scallops for a nice hearty appetizer:

But, there was room for more.

Suddenly, lo and behold, addROC pulled from the oven our Basalmic and Dijion Glazed Christmas Ham.
And it was glorious.

So, like four drunken wise men...we approached, to give it praise:

And then, it was time for a breather.
And BOY-O-BOY did we need one.
Because, I had a special treat in the 'fridge.
Something I had toiled over (not to mention covered the oven in caramel after a slight explosion on the burner, whoops!)...

Yes, I made my FIRST EVER Cheesecake. And, if I do say so myself, it was a triumph. A true gift from heaven and the pastry gods at large.

So here she is, a Caramel Topped Cheesecake with Chopped Praline Chocolate:

It was so fucking fattening that I wanted to explode or die or something after eating it.

But, it was rich and delicious. And though I was near combusting, I was proud.
It was then we all looked at each other and knew, it was time to stop eating.
But, a lovely night it was indeed.

Many thanks to addROC, Reid, and Cliff, as usual, for making my season bright.

Merry Christmas to all! And to all a good night!

Pimp My Parisian Pletzel

2007-12-17T10:30:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was cold and nasty.

I nestled down with my crochet, and decided that I would not leave the apartment for anything; Barring fire and/or life threatening circumstances, of course.

Well, this became a problem when addROC and I got hungry.
Other than some leftovers, which we did perchance to munch, we were kinda stuck.
So, instead of listening to our bellies growl, I pulled out the flour, yeast, eggs, and oil and got to kneading me some special dough.

Yes, Parisian Pletzel, or Jewish Onion Rolls, were suddenly on the menu.

So, I sprinkled the onion like a Christmas (Chanukah?) fairy...and did some badass bakin'.

Oh-so soft, warm, and delicious.

I may be a Goy, but, I can still cook bread for a Kosher occasion.

Praise be to the Gods, whoever they may be, for pimpin' my Pletzel...a yummy snack, without leaving the homestead!

Now, we ALL can say Amen to that!

addROC's Kitchen: Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner

2007-12-14T10:00:00.000-05:00

Breakfast: French Toast

Ah...what better way to wake up than to your man-toy cooking you breakfast?

After making several loaves of Crusty French Bread, I discovered that it's hard to finish a whole loaf before it starts going stale. Being the innovator that he is, addROC proposed that the solution to this dilemma was nothing other than French Toast (see above).

So, we went to visit our neighbor, McDonald's, and grabbed a few iced coffees, pulled out the powdered sugar and 100% pure maple syrup, and went to town. Holla!

Lunch: Pulled Pork Sandwiches, Homemade 'Slaw, Quick Pickled Relish, and White Shoepeg Corn

The cold days have finally come. And, there's nothing nicer than staying cooped up in the ol' homestead. So, addROC put a pork shoulder in the slow cooker and let that baby rock'n'roll.

Approximately 5 hours later...

Homemade pulled pork...and all the fixin's. So delectable. So southern.
Sooooo worth the wait!

Dinner: Steak Diane, Roasted Potatoes, and Roasted Green Beans and Shallots

Steak Diane, a true classic, was recently featured in Gourmet Magazine, and by one of my most favorite blog hostesses, Pinknest. So, addROC whipped it up, and, man was it tasty.

Three meals.
One awesome chef/boyfriend/man-toy.

Life is good.

Me. Want. Cookie.

2007-12-10T11:00:00.000-05:00

Hark!
The tradition of all traditions!
Christmas cookies!

After addROC and I put up our tree, I decided we needed a Christmas snack.
So, I wielded my mixer high in the air, and flung softened butter from the microwave to the mixing bowl.
I pulled out the trusty-dusty x-mas cookie cutters, gave 'em a rinse, and went to town on some HIGHLY caloric dough...

Butter Cookies.
I can already hear the Angels rejoicing!

I rolled out the first batch a bit too thin.
So, they were a little brownish...
Still very edible...

But, I wanted the $$$ shot:

Butter cookie delectable-ness Batman!

I didn't even bother to frost these guys, 'cause, well, I wanted to eat them NOW.

ME. WANT. COOKIE.

Cookie, cookie, cookie.
Mmmyum, mmyum, mmyum.

It's really great being an adult at Christmas.
It's a heartening reminder of how mature we've become, and, how some things never change.

Like, your bratty inner child...and her insatiable appetite for
COOKIES!!!!

O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbaum

2007-12-07T10:30:00.000-05:00

I may have started the season off with a Bah-humbug, but, I've been bitten by the Elf of Christmas Cheer.

Last night, addROC and I headed down to the corner of Nassau Ave. and Diamond St. in Greenpoint to pay a visit to the Christmas tree man. We walked away, happily, with our lovely tree and a new stand.

I put on 106.7 Lite FM, to listen to some x-mas tunes (which, for some reason, are on this station 24/7) and got to work.

First, the lights must be strung (see above).
I can't help but smile like a 4 year old.
There's something about the smell of pine that acts like a hallucinogenic drug, catapulting me into the throes of Christmas glee!

Next, garlands must be made.
What would a tree be without a little cranberry and popcorn on a string!

Then, I got down to business cutting out some snowflakes.
I'm pretty sure that cutting these out increased my chances of getting arthritis 10-fold, but, it's worth it! Look how cute!

And finally, sitting back with a glass of Chianti, and looking at that bad boy.

A little scrappy? Sure.

A Work in progress? Sure.

But, last night, I was reminded of what Nesting is all about, in Brooklyn, Bavaria, Belgium, and beyond. It's about spirit people.

It's hard to hold back screams during the holidays. Everyone is so busy, tired, and spending money they don't have. But, in the end, all that stuff is beside the point. When all's said an done, it's about joy, giving, and sincere thanks for all the good in our lives...

1 Christmas Tree: $25
1 Medium Tree Stand: $10
1 Bag Fresh Cranberries: $2.99
8 Sheets of Uncut Snowflakes: $.08
1 Bowl Freshly Popped Corn: $.15

Finding Myself in the Holiday Spirit: Priceless, bitches!

Go get a tree, or, whatever makes your season bright.

It's all in the small stuff Nesters, it's all in the small stuff.

Let's Get Crafty: DIY Sno-Globes

2007-12-04T10:30:00.000-05:00

December 1st has come and gone, and, while I may not have pulled out my reindeer costume just yet, I'm at least trying to be festive.

So, in preparation for The Diamond's tree trimming party, addROC and I nestled down to get to work on ornaments.

I decided to make a sno-globe.

This is VERY easy, and while they do look a teensy-weensy bit more ghetto than, say, a store bought globe, they're still fun and seasonal!

WHAT YOU'LL NEED:

1-10 Small Double Sided Pictures or Drawings
Light Corn Syrup
Scotch Tape or Clear Packing Tape
A Globe Shape Jar (Goya Honey Jars, in your ethnic food section, work great)
Sparkles or Glitter
Water

1. Make your pictures waterproof by taping them back to back. Make sure that you get a good seal, and push out any air bubbles that may form. Do this at least twice to ensure that no water gets in and water logs your shit.
2. Place your waterproofed images into your jar.
3. Add an 1/8-1/4 of a TSP of glitter or sparkles. You can always add more if you're one of those crazy glitter people.
4. Fill your jar to the 1/2 way point with corn syrup.
5. Fill remainder of jar with water.
6. Cover tightly, and shake.

Voila.
Your very own ghetto sno-globe.
It costs virtually nothing and they're great for any occasion.

So, go make one. And, if you do...send us your photo!

Email photos to: thebrooklynnester (at) gmail (dot) com.

And I'll post any globe that's sent!

And, join addROC and I tonight for some beer and fun at:

The Tree Lighting @ The Diamond
8PM Tonight!
43 Franklin St., Brooklyn, NY 11222
nr. Calyer St.
718-383-5030

Remember to bring a weather proof ornament and get a free beer! Woo-hoo!

Sobriety Checkpoint: The Manhattan

2007-11-29T09:30:00.000-05:00

With the promise of cold weather there is nothing more inviting than a drink that will warm you up.

addROC, my personal chef and mixologist, has been making lots of fun, pretty, and most importantly, tasty drinks lately.

My favorite?

The Manhattan.

I may be The Brooklyn Nester, but, our neighboring borough is equally divine, especially when it's in a glass.

It's classic.
Something our parents and grandparents take a sip of and are hit with a wave of nostalgia.

And, best of all, it's simple. It meets my rule for three ingredients or less. And, it kicks some serious ass.

The Manhattan makes you re-think Red Bull^© and Vodka and other trashy drinks we fall into the habit of ordering sometimes.

This recipe is tried and true.

WHAT YOU'LL NEED:
2 OZ Rye or Bourbon Whiskey
1/2 OZ Sweet Vermouth
A Dash of Angostura® Bitters
A Few Cubes

Easy. Strong. Delicious.

A perfect night cap.

So cheers to a borough that isn't Brooklyn...especially if it's on the rocks!

P.S. I also LOVE this drink with a dash of Orange Bitters. And, if I'm feeling super classy, I'll break out the traditional Martini glasses.

Ho Ho Freakin' Ho

2007-11-27T10:30:00.000-05:00

The holiday season is upon us.

Nester that I am, should I be bursting with joy?
After all, there are pies to be baked, trees to be purchased and decorated.
Little gifts for friends tied up with ribbons (which, obviously, MUST be curled).

Neighbors have already put Santa-related shit in their windows.
Holiday shoppers piss me off as they run around Union Square like a bunch of wild horses, bucking through the crowd on route to the Christmas Village.

So, here I am amidst all this holiday cheer. And, folks, I'm not ready.

Is it just me? Or is it 60 degrees out and is it still FUCKING NOVEMBER?

I just want to tell everyone...calm down.

addROC and I sat down to a lovely weekend brunch at Sunset Diner, relaxing, enjoying the hum of the BQE...runny eggs...toast...and what's that I hear?

I'll Be Home For Christmas?
Fuck no...it couldn't be!
I was just AT home for fucking Thanksgiving, like, t-minus two minutes ago.

Back off you Holiday junkies.

December 1st is WELL on it's way.
Then you can Ho Ho Ho out your asses.

And, hopefully by then, I'll be ready to bake some cookies.

Duck-a-licious.

2007-11-20T11:00:00.000-05:00

Yet again, Reid outdid himself.

We held a mock-Thanksgiving. But, instead of spoiling the Turkey-bird for the big day (and having a shit-load of leftovers for 4 relatively small people), Reid made a delicious duck. And it was seriously kick ass.

We ate. We drank. We digested.

And here's how all the eatin' went down:

For starters, Cliff (who, is responsible for all the lovely photography in this post), brought some beautiful and tasty cheeses:

Then, a cocktail of Champagne with Orange "Caviar." Care of the evening's mixologist, addROC.

Then, Reid pulls out the Duck plate. Yowser!

So the spread is, well, spread! And we feasted in all our duck-a-licious glory:

The Final Score:
Cheese and Champagne with Orange "Caviar"

Duck-a-licious Duck
Sage Stuffing
Giblet Gravy
Homemade Apple Sauce
Green Beans

Honey-Pumpkin Pie

Hells. Yes.

And, finally, an addROC aspertif to end the evening with the gang. This treat was a Vessel 75:

Happy Turkey Day to all. And, a very special thanks to Reid, Cliff, and addROC for their delectable contributions to our most successful mock-Thanksgiving!

I will post more on the big T-day after the weekend!

A Bit of Pork, A Bit of Spice, A Bit of Everything That's Nice

2007-11-16T10:00:00.000-05:00

Reid invited us to a tasty Pork-Chili feast at his place.
How could we say no?!
Reid is the king of pork. That's usually what he's cookin' and it's always good!

So, since addROC had the night off from cooking and I was in no mood for pie, we figured we'd bring something easy to suit this porky occasion.

Cornbread.

I love cornbread, it's such a comforting side dish. And, it's suited to both the cold and warm seasons. So versatile.

I found a basic recipe on ol' trusty epicurious.com and went to town.
addROC had the good sense to utilize a package of jalepenos that were about to meet (and pass) their prime.
So, he cut those bad boys up, and we threw them it.

Bake...and done.

Simple. Tasty. Comforting. With just a little spice and something nice.

Perfect chili...perfect bread. No sweat.

Have a pimpin' weekend y'all.

addROC's Kitchen: A Trip to the Fish Monger

2007-11-15T12:00:00.000-05:00

Ah yes, the "cold" season has arrived.

NOT.

It's November 15th and it was 61 degress when I stepped outside this morning.

Usually, when the weather starts to chill down, addROC turns up the heat in the kitchen. He'll put out all the stops and we'll hunker down for a long-Winter's-meal.

Well, it may be warm outside, but it's getting even warmer in addROC's Kitchen! Time to go gets us some fishies!

Pan Seared Tilapia
with Lime-Chile Butter

I'd never eaten Tilapia before. And no, I'm not kidding.
This was, um, UNGODLY delicious.
I love the mildness of this fish...and that butter, man-oh-man.
Tasty-ness.

Scallops in a Tarragon Cream Sauce
with Roasted Corn
and Red Rice with Roasted Garlic

Scallops are one of my all-time favorites.
This sauce was decadent and rich, but, was nicely balanced by the light flavors of the rice and corn.
But, that garlic man, so delicious...but, let's just say I needed a mint!

Mmm...seafood!

Thanks addROC, ol' buddy, ol' pal! Love those treats from the sea!

From Start, To Finish

2007-11-14T09:30:00.000-05:00

It was a evening for eating with friends.

And, these days, I don't go anywhere empty handed.

So, I took advangtage of my festive mood and decided to whip up some cakes.

Yes, cupcakes.

Being the New Yorker I am, I decided to make Magnolia Bakery's famous recipe. Cliche as they've become, they're a New York treat that's not to be missed.

Mmm...vanilla perfection!

Then addROC and I let them cool and went to town with homemade Vanilla Buttercream Frosting (recipe also care of Magnolia's!)

So much fun, and, so easy.

Go make cupcakes...and make everyone's day, including your own!

'Tis the Season To Be Chili, Fa La La La La, La La La La

2007-11-09T10:10:00.000-05:00

As a small child there were only a few things that could get me out of bed before 9AM. Those were:

#1 Santa Clause (or, the morning of his departure from our house).
#2 My cat(s) annoying the shit out of me.
#3 The Aroma of Mom's Chili

Nothing says Fall & Winter like a steaming bowl of Ma's chili. She'd get that stuff going at 8AM. And by 9AM my father and I were standing at the oven inhaling the sweet, sweet perfume of simmering ground beef, chili powder, onions, and peppers bubbling in a sea of beans.

Bliss.
Chili was a meal in and of itself. Mom threw a nice big bowl down on the dinner table, threw a few slices of bread on top, and that was that.

Dinner was served.

And it was damn good.

So, I, that's right, me, cooked up Ma's recipe and made some fresh Crusty French Bread, and threw it down in front of addROC and a few friends.

That was dinner. And, if I do say so myself, it was damn good.

Jabba the Challah?

2007-11-08T10:00:00.000-05:00

Friends or Relatives?

Well...adventures in bread baking continue.

After baking three loaves of Crusty French Bread, I got pretty sick of it.
So, I decided to take on a braided loaf.

I poked through some recipes and came upon Challah.
The name by itself looks pretty.
I'd had Challah a few times at several Jewish friend's celebrations and as French Toast at a few upscale brunch spots.
But, never straight from the oven.

So off I went, mixing yeast, honey, oil, and flour...

The dough finally reached that oooey-gooey consistency that let's ya know it's good to go.
And, into the oven it went.

It rose, as planned, and I kneaded it down and split it into three pieces.
Attached them all at one end, and braided it.

I let the loaf rise for a final time, and, when I returned...

It was Jabba the Challah.

So I baked that son-of-a-bitch:

And, it didn't taste AWFUL. It was actually pretty good.

But, there's just no way to make peace with bread that's enslaved Princess Leia and kept Han Solo frozen in Carbonite, just because he owes a little cash.

I'll let you know who the next loaf resembles...

addROC's Kitchen: From Epicurean to Expedited Eats

2007-11-07T11:00:00.000-05:00

The "Doctrine of the Clean Plate" is very easy to adopt in my apartment.

Why???

Because I have a live-in Chef.

I eat a great meal almost every night of the week.
In fact, usually, the disappointing night is take-out night.
addROC changes up his menu constantly, while saving a few favorites for possible second appearances.

Sometimes, he toils.
He's prepping when I get home: Chopping shallots, marinating steaks, slicing peppers, and roasting veggies.

And sometimes, he whips something up so quickly, so easily, it's like magic.
Even if it's a simple meal, he manages to make it look like restaurant fare.

The Epicurean:
Pork Medallions in Spiced-Tomato Pan Gravy
with Sliced Vegetables and Quick-pickled Cabbage

Delectable. This meal looked and tasted so fresh, and the pork melted in my mouth.
Sometimes I have to look at my plate for a minute and ask myself:
Is it really just a Tuesday night?

The Expedited Eats:
Jack, Cheddar, and Mozzarella Quesadilla
with Black Beans and Crystal Hot Sauce
Side of Sauteed Corn & Shallots

I remember saying the words, "I'm hungry," and having this plate in front of me what seemed like 3 seconds later. Sometimes a quick and easy meal can be a gourmet meal...all it takes is a little effort on the presentation!

Thanks to addROC for the eats...

A Work In Progress

2007-11-06T10:30:00.000-05:00

If there's anything I've learned about pie, it's that only time will tell how good a pie maker you'll become.

My love affair with pie began hastily, a whole mess of pies, all with different fillings: Pecans, Peanut Butter, Chocolate, Raspberry Chiffon, Apple, Cherry, Gingered-Lemon Meringue.

And then I cooled off. Who cared about my pie anyway?
I'd learned to make dough and that was the goal.

Mission accomplished, or so I thought.

Then, on one of the first of the cooler days, it beckoned.

Pie.

And so, I heeded the call.

I filled my bottom crust with sliced pears, flour, sugar, allspice, and a bit of lemon zest.

Then, I rolled out my lovely top crust. (I won't tell a lie, I secretly think that double crusts are FAR superior to open face pies! Open face?! How common!)

And then, serve. With just a dollop of fresh whipped cream.

Simple. Crisp. Pretty and plain. Just like Fall.

Perhaps it was just a series of events after all:
The chill, the crisp air at the farmer's market, the Mexican dude who took each perfect Bosc pear and lay them beautifully in a fruity display.

It was pie makin' time.

Wondering what kinda pie I'll cook up next?
Me too.

But the most I can tell you at the moment is, well, I'm workin' on it.

The Bitch is Back

2007-11-05T09:30:00.000-05:00

Sincere apologies my faithful Nesters!

My computer was down, and, then I ended up taking an unexpected hiatus.

But, the Bitch is back, and she's feeling renewed and zesty.

While I may have taken a brief break from blogging, the Nesting continued...so there is much to share in the coming weeks!

In any event, I've been feeling kind of guilty for abandoning you all...so, here's a little nugget from 8 million years ago...AKA the Chris Kimball book signing. Some of you emailed me thirsty for details so...here y'are!

CHRISTOPHER KIMBALL'S BOOK SIGNING
@ THE SHOPS AT COLUMBUS CIRCLE

The event opened with Chris chatting about the new book and how America's Test Kitchen works diligently to perfect its recipes.
Then there was a Q&A where all the weird-ass New Yorkers reared their ugly heads and asked totally irrelevant and uninformed questions. The only pertinent piece of information we learned during the Q&A was that when Christopher eats out in New York, he prefers Le Bernardin .
Classy Chris, classy.

Chris and his Test Kitchen crew brought along snacks. Which, as is evident, I munched whilst admiring our new book!

Then Chris signed some books...which we were super-stoked for!!!

And, here is our glorious book, equipped with signature of course!
And, Chris even has a little bow-tie stamp! So cute! It scored him some major Nesting points!

Anyway, even if it was, like, 3 years ago, it was fun and I thought y'all would like to see zee photos!

Have a great Monday! And, stay tuned as I beg for your forgiveness through blogging!

Who Needs Technology?

2007-10-24T10:30:00.001-04:00

(Comic By: ToothpasteForDinner.com)

Dearest Nesters,
My most sincere apologies for my sporadic posting of late.
It seems that the innards of my MacBook are not, at all, like pie filling.
And so, I had to take him to someone with knowledge of a technical nature.
Anyway...as always, my Mac Genius told me that my hard drive or battery or both are toast, so, he's being "fixed up".
Yada yada yada.
If he weren't my computer, I wouldn't give two shits either.

But here's an event you should definitely check out, sent to me care of a lovely reader, and fellow Nester, Dana:

Yes Nesters, I do knit AND crochet.
Actually, all you knit-freaks out there will be sad to learn that I find crochet to be far more dignified, yet, far less difficult than knitting.
But, I've been crocheting the same blanket for the past 2 years.
So, I'm a little slow on the uptake.

But, if I do motivate any time soon, I will totally head over to the Slope side! Thanks Dana!

In the meantime, when my compy is feeling better, I'll post some pictures of my mammoth blanket!!!

Have a Happy, Happy Hump Day!

A Little Dish Music

2007-10-19T10:00:00.000-04:00

Call me crazy, but, I love doing dishes.

It's my therapy.

I have a dish schedule, a dish routine, and a deep love and respect for rubber gloves.

Sure, sometimes after entertaining, I procrastinate a little.
I've winced once or twice at the caked-on sauces and dried-on rice grains, but, overall, I like standing in front of the sink.

One of the best things about doing dishes is listening to my music. I have a dinky-boom-box my Dad got me in high school that lives on our kitchen table and I pop in all my favorite CD's and listen to my favorite radio station.

These are the moments I treasure. And, though you may not want any insight into my soul, here it is anyway, my most listened to dish music...maybe it'll inspire you to go get some Casabellas and step up to the sink.

#1

#2

#3

Or, maybe you're like this bitch:

Of course she doesn't! She's too busy being a filthy whore.

FUCK DISHWASHERS.

Dish time. = Me time.

Call me sad, but, bubbles and suds make me very happy.

Have a great weekend...and don't let those dishes pile up!

Staple-tabulous!

2007-10-18T11:30:00.000-04:00

It's bad enough that I LITERALLY live across the street from a McDonald's.
But, a STAPLES?

C'mon people.
Why the fuck do we need a STAPLES under the BQE in the most random and untraveled area (by office supply consumers anyway) ever?

Well, the answer is, we don't.

But, being the optimist I am, and given that change is something I welcome, generally, I'm trying to look at the bright side of this situation.

addROC and I have decided that these are the pros thus far:

1. If we ever run out of printer toner, we don't have to schlep anywhere. Good thing we NEVER need printer toner!

2. There's a huge fucking parking lot, so, when my Moms comes for dinner she can park her caboose in the STAPLES parking lot. Sweeeeeet!

3. The huge red STAPLES sign matches the McDonald's Golden Arches.
I like matching.
Matching is good.
Especially as I am lulled to sleep by the bright neon lights and the hum of the BQE (thump-thump, thump-thump).
It's like sleeping in the woods...only better! Fuck 'dem crickets!

So, come on over to the new STAPLES on Meeker btw. Kingland and Morgan Aves. when that shit opens!

After you shop-your-office-supply-ass-off, you can come get drunk with me and addROC, and we'll look out on all the corporate lights!

Who needs the fuckin' skyline?

Nester of the Week Update!: Christopher Kimball

2007-10-16T09:30:00.000-04:00

Y'all know how much we love Christopher Kimball! So, it is a pleasure to announce that he will be appearing up in The Shops at Columbus Circle at Borders Books and Music for a book discussion and signing.

His new book:
America's Best Lost Recipes

We're pretty gosh darn excited.

And, yes, we'll be there in our nerdy glory, waitin' to meet the man himself.

Come out and support Chris! It's a one night only engagement!

CHRISTOPHER KIMBALL BOOK SIGNING
Borders Books and Music @ The Shops at Columbus Circle
10/16/2007 (TONIGHT!!!)
7:00PM - 9:00 PM
212-823-9775

Book Club with The Bitch: The Soul of a Chef

2007-10-15T11:30:00.000-04:00

I just picked up this book:

The Soul of a Chef: The Journey Toward Perfection
By Michael Ruhlman

I just finished chapter one...and I'm thirsty for more.

It's a sort of on-the-edge-of-your-seat cooking/literary experience.

I love Ruhlman's style because his passion obviously lies with his subject:
Cooking, Food, the Process, and the Place of the chef.

Yet, his literary sense has me wondering what's more intoxicating, the verse that describes the action, or the action itself?

I invite you to join me for this read, and, a month from today...I'll come back and we'll discuss?

Any takers?

Well, regardless, I'm reading this thing...and, so far so good...

Go pick one up!

Munchies.

2007-10-11T11:30:00.000-04:00

Mmmm...snacking.
One of my favorite pastimes.
But, seriously, what has the world of snacks really come to?

And, where should we draw the line?

Caffeinated Sunflower Seeds:

First it was PowerBar^©.
Then it was Red Bull^©.
And now...Sumseeds^©?

Seriously? Can we not take a vitamin or get a Jamba Juice^© on the way to work?
Have we really sunk so low as to give our Sunflower seeds an energy boost?

Yak.

Calbee Aromatic Grilled Corn Stick^©:

Oh, crazy Asian snacks...what would we be without thee?

On a base level, yes, the idea of this snack is kinda repulsive.
BUT:
I'd still try it.

Yes, maybe we have resorted to tiny-litte-corn-cob-chips, but, at some point we have to decide if it's disgusting or just plain innovative.

For this, I say yea.
I mean, really, who doesn't like mini food?

Sobriety Checkpoint: Oktoberfest!

2007-10-09T10:00:00.000-04:00

I may be The Brooklyn Nester, but, I don't limit myself to my lovely, "little" borough.
One of the things that's great about living in Williamsburg is that we're so close to the city.
And, while I may have been born and bred in Brooklyn, my very-first apartments and my very-first love affair with a neighborhood was with the East Village and Alphabet City!

So, with Oktoberfest upon us, we went out to celebrate addROC's heritage at Zum Schneider.
They had an awesome, not-to-mention super fun, authentic Bavarian band that played to the packed crowd as we guz-guz-guzzled our huge German beers!

And then the rest gets a little blurry...literally...

Why, you ask? Well, Zum Schneider has these beers on tap especially for Oktoberfest, mmmm:

Hacker Pschorr
Hofbräu
Ayinger
Schneider Wiesen Edelweiss

The band only has a few performances left so...go and check them out!

So, as always, from me to you, Prost!

Zum Schneider
Avenue C at 7th Street

Mös'l Franzi and the Ja Ja Ja's
Live Oompah Dates:
Tuesday, Oct. 9 6-9pm (TONIGHT!!!)
Saturday, Oct. 13 4-7pm
Sunday, Oct. 14 4-7pm

As though a rose should shut, and be a bud again.

2007-10-08T10:00:00.000-04:00

While busying one's self with Nester-like activities, it's easy to get caught up in the bigger projects.

There's cleaning the bathroom, doing the dishes, baking bread, baking pie, baking cookies, dusting (occasionally), and of course, when all is said and done, collapsing on the couch with a large, frosty, alcoholic beverage.

But, if we are truly to be great Nesters, we must remember to tend to the small things as well.

Like flowers.

While shopping in Union Square's Greenmarket I came across some beautiful and inexpensive roses. And, when I got them home and put them in some water, I realized that the most simple change, a touch of color, made the room look so much more inviting.

And, I got to utilize this Hefe Weissen glass that I "found" at some bar and never use. It doesn't fit into any of our cabinets and it's been sitting like a lone soldier on the counter for months:

So, voila! Wonderful. Simple. Cheap.

It is in the small stuff. Apparently.

Rising to the Occasion

2007-10-05T10:00:00.000-04:00

So, as you may or may not know, I am suddenly and inexplicably all about baking bread. And, I was about to make my maiden voyage...

addROC was going to make a scrumptious pasta bolognese to compliment my fresh baked bread and it was all planned and perfect.

Then, I get the call from addROC: "Baby, I have to work late, so, either you have to make the bolognese, or, we're not having it tonight."

I was so sad. The thought of my not-even-baked bread without a delicious dish to compliment it...well...what was the point?

So.
Stop the presses.
Holy Fuckin' Shit.
I made dinner.

And it was fabulous! I'm so proud and just a smidgen more confident. But, it was a great way to end the week! Feast your eyes on MY feast!

The bread rose! Amen! And it was crusty and delicious!

Then...I started the sauce...

(I totally stole this recipe from one of my favorite bloggers, Mrs. Hess of Last Night's Dinner. I stole her basic tomato sauce recipe and added lean ground beef before I let the sauce simmer.)

Then...it was time for plating the parpardelle!

So wonderful. Even though my sauce was a tad watery, it tasted like a dream.
And, the lightness of the sauce was great for mopping with fresh-baked bread!

And so, I ride into the sunset, loaves of bread bouncing at my sides...

Have a great weekend! Bake something! It feels (and tastes) SO GOOD!

Bread on the Brain

2007-10-03T10:30:00.000-04:00

Tonight will be my first attempt at bread making.

The Breed of Bread: Crusty French.
The Accompanying Meal (care of addROC): Pasta Bolognese.
The Tension: Mounting.

There is a certain thrill that comes with bread making, because, well, you can do everything right, and still fail dismally.

My memory takes me back to my kitchen in Bay Ridge, my youth, and my mother trying to bake focaccia bread. Trying being the operative word. She would knead and knead, and the dough would never rise. Even though she left it in a covered bowl by the radiator for hours...

The one time the dough humored her, doubling in size, the final product was still appalling. She pulled the stone from the oven, with a beautiful loaf upon it, but, alas, it was like rock. We could have chipped ice with that shit.

Perhaps I will face the same fate...but, when all is said and done, I won't be eating bread out of a can:

Crazy Japanese.

The New Frontier

2007-10-01T11:00:00.000-04:00

With pie tensions mounting, and a daunting amount of tried-and-true recipes to attempt, I felt the sudden urge to flee my kitchen.

It was then, I realized, it's time pie and I had a trial separation.

I'm pied out. Though my love for pie has just been unearthed, I need a new obsession. An obsession with less leftovers and more versatility. And, it didn't take me long to find one.

Yeasted Breads.

I can hear you baking Pros out there chuckling and scoffing at my presumptuous endeavor.
"The nerve. She thinks because she's mastered pie dough that she can take on the stubborn task of yeasted breads? Ha!"

Well, presumptuous I may be, but, it's getting colder, and I want to be nestled up in my apartment watching old episodes of Felicity, and inhaling the sweet, sweet perfume of fresh bread baking (or burning) in the oven.

So, I go forth...into the unknown...

And my one hope is that, like the sun, my dough will rise!

The Ugly Duckling: Cherry Pie

2007-09-28T10:00:00.000-04:00

Pies, like everything, are not always perfect.

On the road to the "Baking Mecca" I seek, I understand that there will be some failures that teach me what not to do.

Now, before you think: "Holy lord, this girl has lost it and is now worshipping a Pie God." I'll cut to the chase.

This pie kinda sucked.
It looked bad.
The filling wasn't awful, but, it was pretty bland.
The crust, excellent.
But, overall, dissapointing.

After the initial upset of having an ugly, not particularly tasty pie, I realized:
The Recipe Sucked.

As a cook who hasn't quite mastered the skill of: Recipes by Osmosis, I have to rely on an actual, phsyical recipe.
I use sources that are reliable (or at least have enough good reviews that I feel confident in making/baking it).

This recipe reminded me that some recipes are flawed.
I found it a little strange that the filling ingredients were only: Cherries, sugar, and cornstarch.
But, because it was a recipe from a reliable source, I didn't question it. I followed it blindly, ignoring my pie instincts.

Lesson learned.
I may have 3/4 of an ugly-ass pie in my fridge, but, the lesson couldn't have been sweeter:
Sometimes it's not you, it's a shit-ass muthafucka of a recipe.

Have a great weekend Nesters...

Sobriety Checkpoint: The Diamond

2007-09-27T09:30:00.000-04:00

A Diamond in the rough indeed.

This is my new favorite place.
addROC and I have been riding our bicycles over to this spot in good ol' Greenpoint for a few weeks now and it seems that I just can't get enough!

This bar is strictly wine and beer. But, don't write it off.
The beer selection is absolutely divine. With lesser known taps and bottles that are ever changing and soooo delicious.

My new favorite beer is one of their bottled selections: ALBA Scots Pine Ale. It's full bodied, and delicious! And addROC noted that it has the slight aroma and flavor of Twizzlers^©!
So different. So good.

Here are some beers that owners Dave and Alex expect to be pouring this season:
Victory Uncle Teddy Bitter
Bluepoint Hoptical Illusion I.P.A.
Defiant Farmhouse Ale
Avery Ellie's Brown
Einbecker Schwartzbier
Abbaye des Rocs Triple Imperiale
Schneider Weisse
Reissdorf Koelsch
Ichtegems Grand Cru
Wintercoat Double Hop
Schneider Wiesen Edel Weisse.

If you're looking to hang out in the sun for what good weather we have left, they have a lovely outdoor area equipped with picnic tables.
And inside they've got a pimpin' shuffleboard. In fact, they're having a shuffleboard tournament this coming Sunday, September 30th.

If you're a local, you'd be a fool not to stop by.
If you're not from the area, I think you may find it's worth the trip!

So, from me to you, cheers...maybe I'll see you there!

The Diamond
43 Franklin St., Brooklyn, NY 11222
nr. Calyer St.
718-383-5030

American Pie Apparel?

2007-09-26T11:00:00.000-04:00

Fall Fashions for the Ultimate Nester:

Indeed.
That's why we love pot holders!

Well...
I think that's obvious.
The better question is: What kind?

I want to know how Steak and Kidney Pie ended up with the biggest slice.
Ludicrous.

Need I explicate?
I think not.

Purchase these shirts at: CafePress.com.
Except the erroneous "Pie Chart" shirt, which you can find at: Threadless.com

An American Classic

2007-09-25T10:30:00.000-04:00

Here she is. The latest in my pie adventures.

Good Ol' Apple Pie. Exquisitely simple. Extremely delicious.

Now that I've earned my "dough chops," so-to-speak, pie has become a whole new ball game.

The obnoxious child in me wants to get decorative and crazy.
But, something in my inner being told me to start where everything starts, at the beginning.

And, just like A starts the alphabet, so Apple starts the pie list in the sky.

So, I eventually told my overzealous alter-ego to calm the fuck down, and I went out and got some Granny Smiths and Fujis. Mixed them with some lemon zest, cinnamon, allspice, sugar, flour, and threw them into this bad-boy.

So.
Fucking.
Good.

Simplicity. It's always a good place to start.

A Few of Our Favorite Things

2007-09-24T12:00:00.000-04:00

1. Pastry Blender
While rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens are certainly cute and cliche, they aren't very functional in the kitchen.

So naturally, being that we spend a goodly amount of time, frolicking to and fro across our linoueum floor, we have come to love certain items more than others.

Above, The Pastry Blender, is the secret to pie dough. Just wonderful.
I was telling addROC, I'm always skeptical of recipes, especially baking recipes, that call for the use of a food processor.

Ummm...The master bakers of the universe, let me tell you, have been long in the ground. They were in the ground way before electricity, and while there are certain things I'll allow for, like, whipping my cream with the use of a mixer, making dough, should be done by hand. Call me old fashioned.

But, I was having some major issues perfecting that flaky crust.
Until the pastry blender.
This little tool gets in where your fingers can't, and isn't going to warm up your butter like your fingers will. Since incorporating this little tool into my routine, dough perfection!
So obvious, so cheap. Go get one.

2. Melamine Bowls

addROC's very awesome sister, who's obviously born of the same great cooking stock as her brother, got addROC these little bowls for Christmas.
Our set didn't come with the spatulas, but, we don't care! These little bowls are frikkin' awesome.
They're great for preping, storing, or when you just want a lil' bit of sumpin' sumpin', like salsa.
They're plastic, so, I can drop them (and have!) anytime, anywhere. Plus, they're a breeze to wash. We use them so much that we really should get another set, they're always in use!

3. The Microplane

You know the story...
A carpentry tool found by a chef. Said Chef decided that this little tool was best thing ever...
And, voila! Suddenly the Microplane is hot shit.
Well, what can we say? A kitchen shouldn't be without one. And ours certainly isn't.

We're zesting lemons, limes, grating garlic, maybe we'll grate our own spices someday, who knows?

I do know this, we love our Microplane! It's durable, easy to clean, and it's a great space saver. And, since it wasn't really intended for food, if you can think it up, you can do it...this tool is impromtu and fabulous!

Real Meals. = Real Awesome.

2007-09-21T10:00:00.000-04:00

Ah, food. What could be more entertaining?

Whether it's in our own kitchens or on the TV screen, it's an obsession that's growing and growing.
So much so, that we're often forced to watch crap. AKA Rachel Ray, Emeril...amongst other celebrity "chefs" that have little to offer other than, well, BAM!

So, when addROC turned me on to RealMeals.TV it felt like a breath of fresh air.

RealMeals.TV has both professional content and user generated content. And, it all looks great.

If you're trying to learn a new trick...it's handy. Having a video to guide you through your recipe can be mucho-de-helpful to those of us without superior culinary expertise.

I was having trouble with pie dough until I watched this video, now I know what to expect visually, and that's nifty:

It helps to see cooking in action.

And, this site, does it for me. Check it out. Whether you're bored on the couch or looking for some party cocktail ideas, I think that RealMeals.TV is a great place to start.

It's food entertainment, without the hype.

And, isn't that refreshing?

Wookiee Cookies: Part Deux

2007-09-20T10:00:00.000-04:00

Behold.

The Wookiee Cookie.

So, I obviously had to make these.
And, honestly, I didn't think they were going to be that good. I mean, common, it's the STAR WARS COOKBOOK, doesn't it exist to be a novelty item and nothing more? Shouldn't STAR WARS fans own it just because?

Nope.
These cookies were off da hook.
They're super chocolaty, light, chewy, and really easy to make.

My office seemed to appreciate my offering of about half the batch. The recipe yielded enough that I needed to get some off my hands, before they ended up in my mouth.

So, go forth, make Wookiee Cookies.

The Force is strong with you, young Padawan.

Sobriety Checkpoint: LaBatt Blue, "BIG BLUE"

2007-09-19T09:00:00.000-04:00

LaBatt Blue is BY FAR, one of our most favorite beers here at The Brooklyn Nester.

Sure, it's not as classy as some, but the ol' Maple Leaf has carried us through many an evening. For an import, it's fuckin' cheap, and while it may be the "Bud of Canada", it sure does taste better.

So, when I came home after a hard day's work to find that addROC had found the infamous "Big Blue" at The MET supermarket (on Driggs Ave. and Russell St. in Greenpoint) for just 99 cents(!!!), I was ecstatic.

The "Big Blue" is a pint of cold, hard, Canadian pleasure.

Run, don't walk, to The MET Nesters...we've never seen LaBatt there before, and one never knows when the beer gnomes will pull it all from the shelves...

...always guzzling in their little, red, hipster-hats!!!

Nester of the Week: Gordon Ramsay

2007-09-18T09:00:00.000-04:00

Swoon.

Call me a BIG loser, but, I frikkin' love this guy.

His his overly-dramatic television persona, his foul-mouthed asshole act, his British joie de vivre! You name it, Gordon Ramsay has it.

Sure, his act is, well, an act.
But, I like his in-your-face attitude and his family values.
If everyone could get past the fact that he's dropping F-Bombs left and right, maybe they'd see that he's a celebrity chef with culinary talent and business know-how worth writing home about.

After I read about his home life, family, and sheep (truly baaaaaad-ass) in a Bon Appetit featurette, it's a lot easier to envision the man behind the effin' mask.

It turns out, he's actually quite the family-man, and making good food is actually a part of the Ramsay family's everyday living. He ain't no Rachel Ray peeps.

Awwww. So he's really a sap after all.

Hell's Kitchen is one of my favorite guilty pleasures. And, I am super-psyched for September 19th's 9PM premiere (Tomorrow people!) of his new show on FOX: Kitchen Nightmares.

Love him or hate him, but, either way join me in raising a glass:

A fucking toast, to you, Gordon Fucking Ramsay!
I Fucking Love You Muthafucka!

Plum Outta Luck

2007-09-17T09:00:00.000-04:00

Plum season. Juicy-ness.

This past weekend, I found myself at McCarren Park's lovely Saturday Farmer's Market, where there were plums a-plenty.

Set on making a Plum Tart, I found myself drooling over basket upon basket of beautiful and colorful plums at the fruit stand.

So, I stuffed 5 lbs of plums in my backpack, and rode my bicycle back to the homestead. All the while, Sugar Plum Fairies danced in my fuckin' head.

Well. I'm glad I got so many frikkin' plums, 'cause the tart was a no-go.
The dough was FUCKED before I even had a chance to fold in the sweet plum filling.

So, like a whiny bitch, I gave up and trashed that son-of-a-bitch.

And, instead, I made this turd.
A "Plum Cake."
We could also call it: "A flavorless, dry, quasi-attractive flour based substance in a pan, somewhat resembling cake."

I'm sticking with pies people. Tart dough is a beeeotch and this cake was garbage.

Oh yeah, Happy Monday.

2007-09-14T10:00:00.000-04:00

Hmmm. Sounds delicious, right?

What could be better than your favorite little, sugary candies in vodka?!

Well, addROC and I found out, a lot of things are WAY better than this supposed sweet treat.

We got the idea from this video:

WHAT YOU'LL NEED:
3 Bags Skittles^©, with the GREEN and PURPLE candies removed
500 ml Bottle of Vodka
1 Sieve or Cheesecloth

Pour out or drink the top 2 oz of vodka from the bottle. Pour Skittles^© into bottle. Shake bottle with Skittles^© until most of the color has bled out of the candy. Let the Skittles^© soak for 24 hours. Using a small sieve or cheesecloth, strain solids from vodka bottle. Pour infused vodka back into bottle.

Enjoy!
Or not. We didn't like the flavor very much, and, we're not really sure what kind of mixer is appropriate for this spirit, we tried Lemon-Lime soda, which didn't really do it for us.

So, try at your own risk...it was still a nifty little project...but for now, I think I'll stick to enjoying the one thing Skittles^© always does right, advertising!

Wookiee Cookies: Chewy, yes. But would Chewy Approve?

2007-09-12T09:30:00.000-04:00

Yet again, in my search to find delicious recipes on the net, I found another treasure. The Star Wars Cookbook!

Maybe y'all knew about this, but, I sure as hell didn't and, with a hardcore fan in the house like addROC, it's my new THANG!

On epicurious.com, I came across the Wookiee Cookie. They sound delectable and they are next in my queue of recipes to try.

But, wait, it gets better. Look at some of the other recipes this book boasts:
Princess Leia Danish Dos, Yoda Soda, Boba Fett-uccine, Han-Burgers, Dark Side Salsa, Jabba Jiggle, and Ewok Eats!

I MUST purchase this book ASAP. Even if the recipes SUCK, someone with addROC's level of adoration for this trilogy (we won't talk about the more recent George Lucas disasters) deserves this collection.

They also came out with a cook book for the newer films, but, let's be real.
Who gives a fuck?

So Chewy...what say you to a Wookiee Cookie?

A Serious Word on Anonymity

2007-09-10T10:00:00.000-04:00

(Painting by Martin Dace)

Today's post is a brief one folks.

I have to tip a bit off the subject today because after reading a post on Only the Blog Knows Brooklyn, titled "I LIKE REAL NAMES OR CONSISTENT WEB ALIASES" I found myself thinking a lot about anonymity and what its place is in the blogosphere, and what it means to me, as a blogger.

So, I replied to this post, in a rather long-winded fashion, and I hope you'll follow the link there and read what Only the Blog Knows Brooklyn has to say too.

Send me your thoughts. Anonymous or not.

addROC's Kitchen: A Little of This, A Little of That...

2007-09-05T09:30:00.000-04:00

Clams Casino

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: One of the BEST things about having addROC in the kitchen is that, you'll never get bored. He's always trying something new, and somehow, it always turns out well.

I think that a constantly changing menu makes for a fun and interesting diet...it keeps your body and your taste buds alert and ready for action.

In this week's segment, I want to highlight the smaller treats that addROC has whipped up...'cause they're tasty and so gosh-darn CUTE!

Above, is addROC's Clams Casino.
Born in family tradition, addROC makes these every once in a while to remind himself of home...and to remind me of how much I can cram in my mouth if I am feeling determined.
Mmmmm...breadcrumbs, bacon, onions, shallots, peppers, and clams! How can you go wrong? Fabulous!

Poblano Poppers

Ah, scrumptious little Poblano peppers filled with: Cream cheese, onion, shallots, peppers...and then wrapped in BACON! Deeeeevine!

I love things with a kick! A great little appetizer before a delicious meal.

And finally, the addROC money shot:

Dinner For Two:

Flank Steak with Chimichurri Sauce
Yucca in a Garlic Lemon Dressing
Fresh Sweet Corn

Everything was stellar.
But, the yucca took me by surprise. So delicious. I'd had it before, but something about the tangy dressing just pushed me over the edge of taste-bud pleasure.
And, as for the steak, need I say there are very few items that surpass grilled steak, in my book?
(And yes! We did hop out on the roof, because, sadly, our days are numbered with the frikkin' cold months upon us!)

So wonderful.

Delicious food, made by other people...

Life is good.

On the Sweet Side...

2007-09-04T10:30:00.000-04:00

Shortbread Cookie Sandwiches with Fresh Strawberry Whipped Cream

Yes, I have become a BAKING MACHINE. And, while it may not be great for our guts, it's certainly a treat for our taste buds.

Here are some of the past week's baking adventures!

Above, Shortbread Cookie Sandwiches with Fresh Strawberry Whipped Cream, were easy, light and delicious.

The Cookies: Shortbread made with European Butter
The Filling: Fresh Whipped Cream with minced bits of fresh strawberries

And, they look VERY pretty with very little effort. Something we all can appreciate!

Raspberry Chiffon Pie

My personal favorite of my baking experiments, thus far.

The Crust: Flaky Butter Crust
The Bottom layer: Homemade raspberry jam
The Middle layer: Cream cheese combined with raspberry preserves and Jell-O^©
The Top layer: Fresh cream whipped with sugar

Soooo, delicious. I just have to toot (Toot, toot!) my own horn here.

Peanut Butter Cream Pie w/Chocolate-Coated Rice Crispie^© Crust

The Crust: Rice Crispies^© coated with semi-sweet chocolate and butter
The Filling: Creme Cheese, condensed milk, peanut butter, and fresh whipped creme
The Decorative Topping: Milk Chocolate and Heavy Creme

Well, this was awesome. But, I was so effin' stuffed after a delicious meal, thanks to addROC and Reid, it was hard to really enjoy this pie. But, addROC and I did bring home the leftovers, so, hopefully tonight, dinner will be a little lighter!

The American Pie Council. Yes, it exists.

2007-08-31T13:30:00.000-04:00

Holy frikkin' crap. There is an American Pie Council.

As some of you may know, I have recently become quite obsessed with pie. I am all about making a ton of pies until I have perfected the art, and then, I plan to move on to tarts, or something else I suck at.

So, I spend a good 3-4 hours of my workweek surfing the web for new and exciting pie recipes for me to bake and/or destroy.

In this week's search, I came across The American Pie Council. And it's absolutely, fucking brilliant. With posts titled: "Random Acts of Pieness" how can you go wrong? I also learned that National Pie Day is on January 23rd! Who knew?

It's $35 bucks to become a regular member, and $25 for students and seniors.

The subscription is pretty pimp. It entitles you to coupons, opens the door to some pie-networking opportunities, AND, my most favorite part, you get a subscription to: PIE TIMES!!!!

Too much people, too much. I love my pie, but this is ridiculous! Go check it out...there is some serious pie making and baking to be done!

And, the best part is, you can access recipes for the current winners of various regional and national pie competitions!

Sweeeeeet. Literally.

Anti-Nester of the Week: Rachel Ray

2007-08-28T10:30:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry, really. But, I just HAVE to go there.

Everyone loves to hate her, but why? Hmmm...

My Top Five Reasons For Hating Rachel Ray

1. I'm not sure what she really does...but I'm pretty sure that I could've done it without her.

2. She's 100% Pure annoying.

3. She's a "chef" that endorses Dunkin' Donuts. Have you ever had a Dunkin' Donuts bagel? Would you endorse it? Exactly.

4. In the one full episode I've seen of her self-titled ABC show, she was cooking with Dr. Phil. Together they were making a one skillet lunch that consisted of:
One, bun-less, Beef Patty Topped with Smoked Mozzarella
A side of canned, cut string-beans (canned string-beans...ewww).

What? This is a cooking show? I may not be a great cook, but, I'm pretty sure the concept of hamburgers and canned vegetables falls under the category of: Lazy & Boring.

5. "Yummers!", "Delish!", and "EVOO" are all a form of brainwashing. There is a very distinct possibility, if I hear her utter them again, that I may shove my own septum into my brain. It's become so bad, even I find myself saying her little catch phrases, in my own fucking kitchen. Sacrilege. She must be stopped!

I leave you with these sentiments:

If we must toast to Rachel, let's do it old school, pick up a 40 oz-er of COLT 45^©. You'll be so wasted by dinner...it won't matter what slop she throws down.

Rubber Glove-y, You're the One.

2007-08-27T09:30:00.000-04:00

All Hail! The geniuses at Casabella have made the BEST GLOVES EVER!!!

I saw these little gems at Duane Reade while debating what kind of scrubber to buy for, my then, heinous tub.

I'll admit, their spiffy packaging was what caught my eye, but, after reading the label's promises (Tapered, snug fit; Cotton flock lining; and Patented cuff!), I decided, for $5.99, I had to buy the gloves.

Well, hot-damn, these gloves deliver on every promise they make, and, in addition, I've found they actually smell kinda nice, a sort of sweetness surrounds their girly-goodness. Not that typical latex-y grossness.

And, can we discuss the fact that they're PINK people! Sooooo much more fun than the yellow-turd gloves that make you look and feel more like a floatation device than a sexy, French maid...

So, get flirty in the suds! These are super durable, don't get water logged, smell pretty, and they're frikkin PINK!!!

Just one more reason why dishwashers are for LAME-Os!!!!

The POM© Hype

2007-08-24T10:00:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I'm in the deli, and I ask myself...why?

Why on EARTH do people consume the shit they consume? And it's not just a matter of the consumption itself, it's a matter of the price we pay to have the honor of consuming!

Fuck that. I'm tired of the advertising industry's psychological warfare.

So, I did it.

I tried POM^©.

Just to see what the big, fuckin' deal was with their big, fancy jar glasses and their super-jacked antioxidants for long life, or whatever.

And, you know what people? It's tea. It's tea, in a fancy jar.

Bottom Line: If you really want to spend $3.75+ on a jar of tea...go for it. That's your prerogative. But, if it were me, I'd do what I had to do to complete my glass collection, and swear off POM^© for life.

Why? Because you're some marketing agent's wet dream.

You saw a a little bit of Pomegranate juice or Tea in a fancy jar, or a fancy cape, or with fancy wings, on the side of a telephone booth somewhere and you decided, for between $3.75 and $5, to buy the hype.

And, what can I say? I did too.

But, trust me, I won't again.

For Christ's Sake...A Little Sun Please

2007-08-23T10:30:00.000-04:00

(Photo By Joe Schumacher)

Dear Mr. Sun,

I'm frikkin' dying here.

Light deprivation SUCKS.

I can't motivate to do anything.
Like, for real, absolutely nothing.
I can't bake, or clean, or bitch about shitty household products without considering putting a razor blade to my wrist.

Even my fucking plants are having difficulty with photosynthesis, you rat bastard.

I mean, seriously, it's still frikkin' August and on Tuesday we had the coldest day, for this time of year, since 1911! What the FUCK do you think you're playing at muthafucka?

Is this how they live in Seattle, Mr. Sun? 'Cause, that's fucked up.

Fuck you very much,
Brooklyn Bitch

Home again, home again. Jiggity jog.

2007-08-22T09:30:00.000-04:00

Yes, home indeed.

And, while it's nice to be back in the saddle, it's also incredibly sad to leave the perfect scenery of Cape Cod, and the company of friends to return to New York's hustle and bustle.

It was a pain to drag the camera around, due to sporadic beach hopping and extreme levels of inebriation, but, addROC did manage to take the stunning pictures in this post on the beach, after a day of fishing with his old buds.

We had a kick ass time. And, need I say that we did some serious eatin' while we were away? Well, I'll say it anyway, we did some SERIOUS eating while we were on the Cape. Our first day we grilled out summer style with: Spicy BBQ Chicken Wings, and the old standbys, Burgers and Dogs. Not to mention, one of my favorite guilty pleasures, Cool Ranch Doritos^©.

But, the real joy was our favorite place to stop and stuff our faces: Seafood Sam's. With 4 locations on the Cape, this place has seafood down to a science. We ate a little, or a lot, of the following delicacies: Lobster Rolls (jam-packed with huge chunks of delicious lobster), Clam Chowder, Deep Fried Scallops, Deep Fried White Fish, and some tangy Coleslaw.

Oh my God. Amazing.

But here I am, back in my little Brooklyn apartment.
And, I'm getting ready to bake bitches, fall's in the air.
Even though, in my mind, I'm still wishing I was on the beach...

...and I bet now, you are too.

Road Trippin': Cape Cod

2007-08-16T10:30:00.000-04:00

Holla! addROC and I are getting the fuck out of dodge tonight, and driving up to good ol' New England!

Yes, it's that magical time where we sit on long, beautiful beaches, drinking can after can of Bud Light to re-hydrate, and eating BBQ with friends that we haven't seen in too long.

If that doesn't sound like summer, I don't know what does.

Then, we are going to our favorite Cape seafood stop, which I will be sure to post about when we return! I'll just give you a teensy-weensy preview and say, that this joint has the best fuckin' Lobster Rolls I have EVER put in my mouth, and, that means they're good, real good.

Not to mention addROC has a few culinary surprises up his sleeve for our gracious hosts. And of course, ridiculous quantities of booze for both day-time sun-bathing and evening bonfire beach consumption.

Ah, sweet summer, as you drift away...I cling to what beauteous treasures you have left to behold...

Apologies in advance for the break from posting...but, I'll be severely inebriated on a beach in Cape Cod, would you really want to hear me blather away, slurring horrendeously?

Gingered-Lemon Meringue Pie : 1, Me : 0

2007-08-15T09:30:00.000-04:00

Yeeeeah, if this were a tennis match, I would've just gotten ACED.

Even more sad, it was no tennis match, it was another attempt at baking.

Yes, after my success with White Chocolate Pecan Pie, I thought I'd take my new, overpriced mixer and dally about in the land of pie-making prestige and attempt a Gingered-Lemon Meringue Pie.

Alas, It didn't work out the way I'd hoped.

Though it looks pretty in the picture, my Gingered-Lemon filling was a bit too tart, and after baking the meringue on top, the filling wasn't quite set enough for easy serving OR eating.

But, addROC and I agree that it was not a total failure. The crust, while basic, was baked to perfection and had a great flavor, and my meringue was EGGCELLENT!!!

And, let's let that be my baking humor for the day, it only goes downhill from here.

Nester of the Week: Christopher Kimball

2007-08-14T10:00:00.000-04:00

We love Christopher because he's the founder of several of our favorite multi-media cooking education and entertainment sources!

Yes, he's the Mastermind behind gems like America's Test Kitchen on PBS, and the outstanding print publications: Cook's Illustrated Magazine and Cook's Country Magazine. Not to mention the author and co-author of several cookbooks put out in association with those magazines.

The first time we set eyes on him in America's Test Kitchen, his zany manner and love for food became instantly infectious. He's so much fun, and his obsession with a recipe's perfection is both admirable and inspiring.

While his accolades may be many, he certainly isn't a snob, though he's a foodie for sure. His unpretentious approach to cooking and prep make it all seem so easy and light hearted. And, isn't that the sign of a true pro?

Here's to you Christopher...you tested all the bunk recipes so we didn't have to...and you frikkin' rock.

Brooklyn Bitch's Cleaning Essentials

2007-08-13T11:30:00.000-04:00

A new week begins.

And so, as I do almost every week, I've promised myself that I am going to scrub the fuck out of the bathroom.

Not my favorite chore. But, each time I do it, I get better at it.

It's like your math homework from back in the 9th grade. You bitched and bitched about having to do it, thinking you were a dumb-ass. And, then you did the work, and it fuckin' sucked, but, by the end, you knew your shit.

Your Mom was right.

So, here are a few products that are my cleaning staples. I don't believe in having different products for different rooms. Blah, blah, blah. If the fuckin' spray can't disinfect the toilet as well as the counter, then FUCK the spray.

So, while we're on the subject, let's look at the two multi-purpose sprays that are da bomb diggity shit:

1. Mr. Clean^© Antibacterial Multi-Surface Spray

Best spray EVER.
This stuff works great in the kitchen on dirty and/or greasy counters, AND, it also kicks some serious ass in the bathroom in toilets and around the sink area.
I also use this spray on glass table tops, mirrors, and lacquered wood.
I live and swear by this stuff.

2. Febreeze^©

If you don't have a bottle already, you've been living like a dirty hippie for too long. This stuff is a Godsend. Now, I'm not saying that you should use Febreeze^© instead of laundering your clothing and towels (and, I did knew some dirty frat boys once upon a time who used Febreeze^© as an alternative to TIDE^©), but, if you're a few days overdue for a washing and your stuff's a little funky, this stuff is great. A spritz or two on the couch before guests arrive, and they'll think you've been cleaning all day.
Huzzah, it's like deodorant, for cloth!

3. Soft Scrub^©

This stuff is possibly the best tub solution on the market. It is PERFECT for all you lazy people out there who just want to "wax-on, wax-off." All you do, is pour some of this stuff onto the nastiness in your tub, wait 15-30 minutes, go back and lightly scrub with a sponge. Simple and easy. And, though it does have a slightly bleachy smell, it's way milder than actual bleach, and not nearly as harsh!

4. Swiffer^© Dusters

Um, these are frikkin' awesome.
They actually perform better than Swiffer^© gives them credit for in their commercials. These little powerhouses not only latch onto dust like muthafuckas, they even pick up small dirt particles and other nastiness that's collected in and around your couch. They rock, as do most Swiffer^© products, if you ask me!

Go little nesters, take your new weapons and motivate.

The battle rages on...

A Roof with a View...and a Grill

2007-08-10T09:30:00.000-04:00

Here at The Brooklyn Nester, we love our roof.

At first glance, it isn't much. Just a crappy, small square. But, in the summer, it's really nice to get outdoors, especially if you are like us, sans an AC unit.

Crappy as it may appear, we like going out there:

1. To grill.
2. To enjoy a brewsky.
3. To save our smoker guests the trip downstairs.
4. To "garden" (AKA water plants and herbs).
5. To soak up some rays, in hopes of caramelizing our pasty white asses.

But, mainly because of #1, grilling. Here at The Brooklyn Nester, we're a teeny-weensy bit pyro:

We love a good fire. What's even more pimp, is fire's ability to cook meats, delicious, delicious meats:

You saw them plated in my last post, but, don't these BBQ Chicken Skewers look just bitchin' right on the grill?! Not to mention, the aroma. Nothing smells better than BBQ in the air on a hot summer night.

And while our Steak Marinated in Terriaki with Minced Garlic was not featured in our addROC's Kitchen segment, it surely deserves accolades. This steak smelled so fucking good when it was cooking, words cannot capture my desperate need to consume this piece of meat.

It's our own little crap-ass sanctuary. And it's awesome.
Please, take advantage of the outdoors now...I implore you. The cold season is fast approaching.

And, that fuckin' sucks...

"When this old world starts a getting me down,
And people are just too much for me to face,
I'll climb way up to the top of the stairs,
And all my cares just drift right into space...up on the roof..."
-James Taylor-

(Yes, I just quoted James Taylor and I'm under 35. Deal.)

addROC's Kitchen: Skewers, Salads, and Pie! Oh My!

2007-08-09T11:00:00.000-04:00

Yet again, addROC made my week by feeding me and our friends.
I love addROC, especially in the kitchen, because, well, his dishes are constantly changing. It turns out, that variety actually is the spice of life and there's nothing like keeping your taste buds on their toes.

This week, addROC went with an Asian theme, and we all reaped the benefits...feast your eyes on this week's tasty treats.

Night #1: Just the Two of Us

Shredded Thai Chicken
with Peanut Sauce Over Soba Noodles

OMG! So frikkin' good. When addROC makes me soba noodles, it's pretty much in the bag, he's gettin' lucky.
This dish was outta this world and I can't wait for the next soba adventure...

Night #2: Entertaining Friends...

Grilled BBQ Chicken Skewers
Toasted Barley, Corn, Onion, and Pepper Salad
Marinated Heirloom Tomatoes and Red Pearl Onions

De-vine. Anything from the grill is always a treat, and, I'm a huge fan of salads with grains.

and

Drumroll...

I actually cooked something for our guests! A Pie! Without any help! Looky here nesters, I'm not as domestically disabled as you all thought!

White Chocolate Pecan Pie

Very tasty, if I do say myself. Though, I do intend to further hone my baking skills, as I ended up buying a rather upscale mixer solely to make this little pie!

Clean plates said it all! Thanks again to addROC...I'm already looking forward to eating next week's editions!

2007-08-07T10:00:00.000-04:00

We discovered this scrumptious sipable thanks to our great friend and favorite photag, Cliff Hawkins. While he was flitting about the city, drinking of course, he found this gem at APT (419 West 13th Street) and decided to whip 'em up at home and, of course, for us, his gratified guests.

I love this drink for several reasons:
1. It meets my rule: 3 ingredients or less.
2. It's refreshing as fuck.
3. Pimm's isn't as strong as some other liqueurs, so, you can have a couple big glasses before you're in the bag.
4. It's so gosh-darn purdy.
5. It makes me feel like I'm in Savannah, enjoying a drink with the other debutantes.

WHAT YOU'LL NEED:
1 Bottle Pimm's^© No. 1
1 Bottle Ginger Ale
1 Cucumber, thinly sliced
A Large Glass
5-7 Ice Cubes

In your glass filled with ice, pour Pimm's No.1 so that it fills half the glass. Then, pour the ginger ale over the Pimm's^© to the brim of the glass. Garnish with cucumber slices to taste.

Enjoy!

This is a true summer drink: Light, crisp, and great for a lazy afternoon with friends.

Y'all enjoy yer beverages now...

Tips For the Narcoleptic Nester

2007-08-06T11:00:00.000-04:00

(Photo by Cliff Hawkins)

Yes nesters, even I fall down on the job.

With all of life's Sobriety Checkpoints, sometimes we just fall like toy soldiers.

When you you drink too much, it can be hard to stay awake. I know this, all to well, and am the butt of many a joke because of my seemingly narcoleptic nature.

Places I've Passed Out Drunk, Recently:

1. My couch in Brooklyn.
2. Other people's couches in Brooklyn.
3. An upstate Table (see above).
4. A Canadian Slot Machine.

How can you avoid passing out drunk? Funny you should ask! I have some tips for you inebriated (and sleepy) nesters out there.

Tips for Staying Awake While Wasted:

1. Red Bull^©: None of sugar-free shit people, you need every freaking calorie possible.

2. Keep moving: If you sit down, you WILL pass out. Play Wii^©, dance with other drunkards, or bend-it-up with Twister^©, after all, it was invented for this very purpose.

3. Get Smacked: This is why you have friends and significant others. They're not afraid to bitch-slap the fuck out of you. It'll put the pep back in your step, and, maybe it'll make their night as well. After all, you are a little bitch.

4. Water: DUH! Forget about breaking the seal...this is about survival now. Chase your Red Bull^© with some Aqua! (Brooklyn tap water kicks some serious ass, so, don't sweat it if you can't locate your Poland Spring^©!)

5. Deal with It: Ok. At some point, you're going to have to make peace with the fact that you are drunk, wasted even, and your body needs to shut down. Stop fighting it. If Steps 1-4 weren't enough, you're toasted. Just pass the fuck out.

Good luck! And remember...if you're going to be pass-out drunk, do it with people who have the good sense to look out for you. This is New York City. Be smart.

Be safe and have a great Monday!

Nester of the Week: Martha Stewart

2007-08-03T09:30:00.000-04:00

OK. So, she's the ultimate nester, forever and ever. Amen.

But, just because she's on the cover of WIRED Magazine this month, we have to give her Nester of the Week.

She's classy, bitchy, business savvy, and fucking clever. And, while she may have sold out, just a little, she's still awesome.

And, for WIRED, she made a kick-ass Wii cake! Awesomeness.

Toast to Martha with something classy, like a Bordeaux or Chablis.

You're too good for this world Martha, you're too good. That's why they tried to lock you up...

But, we know here at The Brooklyn Nester, you're the nesting Wizard, and Martha, no one's gonna hold you back.

Not nobody, not no how!

Won't YOU Be My Neighbor?

2007-08-03T09:00:00.000-04:00

This is the conclusion I've come to: You either love your neighbors, or, you fucking hate them.

So, when addROC and I met our apartment neighbors and they were decent, we were like, bonus!

Little did we know that lurking right next door was a huge jerkface muthafucka.

Yes, our neighbor one building over is a total asshole. He gives us shit for putting trash out in front of our own apartment building, claiming that he has to "clean up" after our messes.

Now, I am Brooklyn Bitch of The Brooklyn Fucking Nester, I do not MAKE messes. I clean them, bitches. So this dude just pissed us off.

Well, a while back, our fucknut-of-a-neighbor started piling bricks up on and around his stoop. Lots of fucking bricks. So, when addROC and I saw our nemesis moving this assload of bricks into his building, we became suspicious.

Lo and behold, we were grilling out on our roof, and I happened to look over the edge into our neighbor's "yard."

It's always been a dump down there, but, it seems that he has made preparations to build upon that dump. And, though I cannot say with any amount of certainty, I'm pretty sure that he doesn't have a permit for such expansion.

What's worse is that we think, by the looks of it, that he is building more apartments. Whack.

Even Mr. Rogers himself would ban this douchebag from the neighborhood.

But, I'm no whistle blower, so, the atrocities will continue...

Korean BBQ in 'Da Burg: Dokebi Bar & Grill

2007-08-01T15:00:00.000-04:00

So as the result of losing a bet to addROC, the beeotch, I had to buy him dinner.

He decided on Dokebi Bar & Grill on Grand Avenue between Bedford and Driggs Avenues in Willamsburg.

We ordered the Spicy Ribeye, which came with a bunch of great little sides to add to your beef and lettuce wrap: Black and White Rice, Black Beans, Cucumber, Kimichi, Watercress, Onions, and Soybean Paste.

Everything was super fresh and tasty, not to mention very pretty.

But, the best part was cooking at our table with our own lil' BBQ Grill right in the center! I felt like a little kid in arts and crafts class!

Check out our mad grillin' skills:

This place was fun, tasty, and if you hit it at happy hour you can get two draft beers for the price of one! Now who can turn that down?

We highly recommend this joint.

Mmmm...BBQ...

2007-07-31T09:00:00.000-04:00

One of the the worst things ever is mopping the fucking floor.
So, when you actually motivate to mop, or Swiffer^© Wet Jet, or what-have-you, you don't want to be deterred by a piece of shit, fucking electric broom.

Stages of Floor Mopping:

1.Electric Broom and/or Sweep Floor
2.Mop Floor
3.Allow Floor to Dry
4.Enjoy Clean Floor

Simple, no?

So, when I received the Dirt Devil^© Broom Vac from my mother as a gift, I was stoked. 'Cause, let's be real, sweeping fucking sucks in every way possible.

This "Broom Vac" has no suction WHATSOEVER, nor is it a good broom independent of the vacuum feature. Just because the folks in the commercial are dancing around like jackasses and putting on what looks like a high school musical in their kitchen, does not mean that this contraption does jack-shit.

Bottom Line: This is a large paperweight, piece of shit. I realize some other electric options aren't as "affordable," but, buying this "Broom Vac" would be like throwing your money in a huge, burning trash bin.

Save your cash and get a dustpan, bitches. This hunk of junk BLOWS.

Bag O' Tomatoes: Step 1 - Sweet, Sweet Tomato Love

2007-07-30T12:00:00.000-04:00

Yay!!! So we finally found some time to get busy with our bag of Tomato Magic!

How the Hot Tomato Love Went Down:

Above:(Left) An expanded peat-pellet in a Tupperware^© (Right) Peat-pellets before expansion and Tomato seeds.

1. We put one, thin peat-pellet into a Tupperware.^©
2. We poured 1/2 cup warm water over the pellet.
3. Then we waited around 5 minutes for the pellet to expand.
4. We fluffed the peat on the surface of the pellet.
5. We sowed 2 tomato seeds.
6. Then we ran and hid it in a dark place, and we're leaving it there until we see some sweet, sweet sprout action...

Seriously though, who knew tomatoes were so frikkin' sexy?!

addROC's Kitchen: 2 Nights, 2 Meals

2007-07-29T12:00:00.000-04:00

Mmmm...veggies from Union Square's Greenmarket.
These were the colorful ingredients my boyfriend, addROC, chose to cook with this weekend.

Here at The Brooklyn Nester, Brooklyn Bitch does a lot of nesting, but, not a lot of cooking. I leave that task to persons with the know-how, and I'll do the dishes...I promise.

Join me as I highlight the delicious eats that we enjoyed this weekend here at The Brooklyn Nester in addROC's Kitchen.

Night #1: Just the Two of Us

Pork Chops with a Spicy Orange Glaze
Tomato, Fennel, Onion, and Ham Salad with a Parmesan Dressing
Fresh Sweet Corn

Absolute perfection. And, the colors were beautiful. Something pretty always tastes better!

Night 2: Grilling for Friends

Salsa Verde
Fried Fresh-Corn Fritters
Dirty Rice with Pork Sausage
Cucumber and Onion Salad with Thai Sweet-Chili Dressing
Grilled Garlic-Shallot Burgers Topped with Cheddar, Onion, and Tomato

Salsa Verde
Fried Fresh-Corn Fritters
Dirty Rice with Pork Sausage
Cucumber and Onion Salad with Thai Sweet-Chili Dressing

Grilled Garlic-Shallot Burger Topped with Cheddar, Onion, and Tomato

Huzzah for men who can cook, 'cause I sure can't!

Many thanks to addROC for another delicious weekend.

Enjoy the rest of yours!

Garbage Men Are A Lot Like Umbrellas

2007-07-26T12:00:00.000-04:00

You know how your mom used hand you an umbrella as you walked out the door, and then you had to drag it everywhere with you, all day, and then it didn't fucking rain?

Do you remember getting smart?

You told your mom to fuck off and left the house without your umbrella.
You rebel, you.
And then, it fucking poured.

I find that the NYC Sanitation Department is something like my mom's mystical umbrella.

The Brooklyn Nester's garbage day is Wednesday. So, Tuesday night, we either motivate to bring down all our shit OR we decide that we're waking up early enough to get it all down to the curb before the fat lady sings.

I can't fucking win though.
If we convince our drunk asses to bring all the trash down at 1AM...it is still sitting on the curb when I leave the apartment at 8AM.

If we don't take it down, that shit-ass-muthafucka of a garbage truck will inevitably wake me up at 6AM.

Bullshit people. Utter bullshit. How am I expected to Nest under these conditions?!

I sometimes think that throwing my umbrella in the trash could offset this quandary, but, I fear combining these two mysterious sources of power would result in immediate and certain death.

The Brooklyn Project: And God said, "Let There Be...Floor?"

2007-07-25T09:00:00.000-04:00

Yes, my bitchin' nesters, the lord hath shone his light on me.

After many baby steps into the bedroom (and then back out again), I learned that I do, indeed, have a floor.

At first I was all Pauly Shored out, like, whoa, what is this wood-like substance?

But then, I came to realize that when you pick up 6 months worth of clothing, both clean and dirty, a whole new world is revealed: Hard Wood Floors!

Let's look at the before picture, shall we?

Eeek fest. That is a true tragedy. And, let me tell you, I'm no where near being finished. Rome wasn't built in a day, but, I've definitely made some headway.

Now, feast your eyes on the fruit of my highly motivated labor:

Hosanna and Hallelujah!

What to Expect When You Clean Your Bedroom:

1. Be prepared to throw shit away people.
I mean clothes, old books, magazines, used tissues, and worse.

2. Get a Ziplock^©! There's change EVERYWHERE!
I feel like I struck it rich down there in the bowels of the bedroom! Don't walk people, run! Your fortune awaits you. (Results Not Typical)

3. Don't expect to finish.
Do enough work to see a difference, then take a break. The longer it takes to shape the place up, the more you'll aim to keep it in that condition.

Motivate nesters! I haven't felt this accomplished in weeks!
Go, re-discover your floors!
God made them for a reason!

Nester of the Week: Marge Simpson

2007-07-24T19:00:00.000-04:00

When it comes to nesting, Marge Simpson is my hero.

Obviously, she's the best animated Mom ever, and she's got time for everything and everyone.

We've only seen her screw up a couple times, and I don't know anyone who doesn't love this blue-haired lady. She can bake a cake, sew a costume, halt her hubby, and barricade Bart, all with Maggie on her hip.

The Simpson Movie comes out this weekend, and you can bet you're bottom dollar, this Nester is gonna be there.

Homage must be paid to the Nesters that have come before...and who continue to put us all to shame.

If I could get a DUFF brew in these parts, I would. But for now, this Mike's Hard Lemonade^© will have to do.

Marge, here's to you.